Training Wheels
by Who needs coordination anyways
Summary: “What can I say? I’m irresistible.” Blair rolled her eyes, “No, you’re quite resistible." Life tends to be similar to riding a bike, and Blair Waldorf is tired of relying on her training wheels. C/B.
1. Boredom Causes Hobbies

A/N: So this started out as a one-shot but there was way too much plot. I'll warn you ahead of time, if you can't handle fluff turn back now, this thing is multi-chaptered. **  
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* * *

**Training Wheels**

Blair quickly took a bite of Serena's doughnut after making sure she wasn't paying attention.

Dan had called five minutes ago and still counting. Absently her fingers ran over the carvings on Blair's bed frame as she stood with her back turned for the time being.

Blair took another bite and glanced at the half eaten doughnut before shrugging and finishing the rest.

Finally Serena hung up and flopped herself back down onto Blair's bed, "Sorry about that, he was trying to figure out...hey! You ate my doughnut!"

Blair grinned with a mouthful of doughnut and they both started laughing.

It had been several weeks since Gossip Girl had exposed Blair's trysts with Chuck, marking her topple of power in the Upper East Side.

Without Serena Blair knew that she would, no doubt, have been munching on croissants in France at this very moment. Everyone had shunned her, even little Jenny.

And no matter if she was Dan's sister, Blair was going to make sure she got what was coming to her. As well as everyone else.

What had happened to Blair was horrifying.

She played board games with Dorota on Friday nights, she tried learning how to knit, she even began to help cook; as long as it wasn't too complicated.

And Blair Waldorf didn't _do_ domestic tasks.

Her influence of banishment was reaching a point where no one was even speaking to Serena, besides Dan of course, because she associated with Blair.

After the two finished breakfast they started watching Casablanca. No matter that she tried to be discreet, Blair saw Serena check her cell phone half-way through. "You can go meet Cabbage Patch if you have to. After all who else besides him and I can you hang out with nowadays? If you piss him off you're going to be stuck with me all the time."

Serena rolled her eyes, "Shut up, do you think I would be here so often if you were that horrible? I didn't know how late it already was when I told him a time or I would have made it for later."

Blair waved it off and gave her a hug before sitting back on the bed, "Yeah, yeah, just call me when you can."

Serena promised she would before dashing off.

In reality the only reason Blair was being lenient was because she had gotten her taste of abandonment and she didn't like it one bit.

When Serena had come back from boarding school no one was there for her, and then she met Dan. As seeing it was Blair's fault that Serena had been put into exile she figured she had better sit back and let Serena be, she had done her time.

Blair leaned back onto her pillow and tried to think of anybody on the face of the planet she could spend time with, that is, anybody she didn't pay.

She decided to finish the rest of the movie before going to hunt down Dorota and paint her nails a bizarre fuchsia color.

An hour and a half later Dorota blew at her nails carefully with eyebrows raised, "Why...thank you Miss Blair. What a _nice_ color."

Blair snickered under her breath, "I'm glad you like it. Now Dorota, I know you're getting sick of me, can you think of something else to occupy my time? Knitting didn't work out too well."

Dorota frowned, "Well a good hobby is what you need. I have a cousin who paints."

Blair grimaced slightly and waved for her to continue, "Just keep listing until I hear something interesting."

Dorota nodded, "Sewing, checkers, bird watching, puzzles, biking, gardening."

A ring made her jump to her feet, "Oh Miss Blair, I have to go finish lunch before your mother returns, I'm sorry!"

Blair smiled, "Thank you Dorota." She stalled on her way back to her room going over the list in her head. What could she do for the next how many hours, by herself?

What a thrill to be a social pariah.

* * *

Serena threw the dirty dish rag at Dan laughing at his outraged expression. "You know when you said you'd put me to work I didn't think you meant manual labor." 

Dan shook his head at her, "What? It's my turn to clean and you were perfectly willing."

She was about to jokingly protest when her phone rang.

Serena picked up and held it to her ear as she dusted a vase three shelves above her head. "Hey Mom, what's up?"

A slight pause occurred before Lily began, "Darling, Bart hasn't seen Chuck in a couple of days and he's getting a little worried. Would you go check up on him?"

She stopped dusting in surprise; obviously Bart Bass didn't care enough to go see Chuck himself. The hotel service more than likely had sent along a notice stating that Chuck had been lurking in his room for a solid forty eight hours and were wondering if he had died in there.

Serena sighed, "Sure Mom but you owe me, alright?"

It wasn't that large of a sacrifice for her. She had been wondering how Chuck was, he had lost everyone close to him as well and from Blair's demeanor when she had asked, they hadn't parted on good terms.

Serena snapped the phone shut, "I've got to do a favor for my mom, I'll talk to you later!"

Dan took the duster from her in surrender, "I knew from the moment I tossed that banana peel on the ground this place was going to force me to tidy up."

She smiled innocently and pecked him on the cheek before striding out of the room, awkwardly avoiding eye contact with Jenny in the process.

After a conniving chat with the hotel staff she was armed with a spare key.

Serena was worried she would have to walk in with her eyes covered for what Chuck might be preoccupied with, but it was still. She poked her head around the corner and saw the back of Chuck's head on his couch as he watched a movie.

Creeping forward she made an effort to remain hidden for the moment. His eyes were transfixed in morbid fascination to the screen, a glass of scotch resting at his lips.

The tomb scene from Franco Zeffirelli's Romeo and Juliet was playing and Chuck was entranced.

Serena found it odd that he was watching Romeo and Juliet when before the Debutante Ball Blair had mentioned something about wanting someone like Romeo to risk it all for her.

The heartbreaking sequence played through and once it ended Chuck rewound it and watched it again, he had been watching it for hours.

Finally Serena stepped forward and gently laid her hand on his shoulder.

Chuck whirled around nearly dropping his glass, "Dammit Serena!"

She stepped back guiltily, "Sorry, I forgot you didn't know I was here."

He paused the movie and turned his eyes to her, "And why are you here?"

Serena didn't want to be blunt so she shrugged and took a seat on the opposite arm of the couch. "How've you been?"

Chuck lifted an eyebrow, "Fine. How's Blair been? And don't you dare tell her I asked."

She frowned at him, clearly Chuck wasn't holding up much better than Blair was in this solitary confinement, whether it was voluntary or not. "She's ok, I guess. I'm the only one she ever spends time with besides her mom occasionally and Dorota."

Chuck nodded and took a sip from his glass, "Has Nate asked for her back yet?"

He had never thought much of grand gestures but Blair did something to him that he couldn't explain. Although the words he threw at her were the most spiteful he had ever spoken, he did it for her.

If she hated him then she still had a chance to get back together with Nate and if that made her happy then he'd make sure she could get whatever she wanted.

It wasn't an entirely coherent tangent. It was twisted. The whole ordeal was such a Chuck-like account he was surprised Blair hadn't flat out called him on his bluff.

But he was secretly pleased with himself; it proved that he loved Blair more; he was willing to sacrifice for her.

Serena stared at the forlorn boy in front of her, where was his confident smirk? His perverted, but somehow still, clever jibes? Just as a test she offered, "What if I said I came up to see if you had bathed yet?"

Chuck's eyes widened in surprise, "Well, I would have figured."

They both stared at each other before breaking into a bout of laughter. Chuck sighed as he rubbed at his face, "Hey give me a break, I'm a little rusty."

Serena giggled, "Obviously. I never thought I would say this but I miss your horrible comments. You're Chuck Bass! Are you letting _Gossip Girl_ of all things get to you? At the very least you need to get out more, because right now, even _I_ can come up with better dirty comebacks than you can."

He hurled a pillow at her head, "Thanks for the advice Dear Abbey."

She smiled as she headed back to the door, "And you didn't even need to go online." As she closed the door behind her Chuck couldn't stop the snort of laughter.

* * *

Blair was hunched over the glass table in her entryway when Serena walked in. 

As she got closer she saw the massive teddy bear puzzle that was nearly completed.

Blair looked up in relief, "Oh thank God!" She got to her feet and pulled Serena away from the table, "Its five thousand pieces, I've been working on it all day. Well, after trying my hand at bird watching. I've never realized that the only birds around here are pigeons."

Serena couldn't keep a straight face, "You were trying out hobbies?"

Blair pursed her lips, "Hey, not all of us have many other options at the time being. So what are you doing tomorrow?"

The smile turned into a frown on Serena's face. "My mom organized this get together for me and my grandmother so we can 'reconcile' before the wedding. She doesn't want us snipping at each other."

Blair rolled her eyes, "Well, whatever. I have plenty of other things to do."

Serena motioned to the puzzle, "What? Is there a matching rubber duck puzzle with ten thousand pieces?"

Blair crossed her arms in defiance trying to think of one of the hobbies Dorota had listed, "No! I'm going to buy a bike tomorrow." She almost winced at that choice.

Her eyes bright with amusement Serena cocked her head, "Really? I wish I could see that since you don't know how to ride a bike."

Blair shrugged, "No time like the present to learn."

She headed up the stairs and jumped onto her bed, Serena following behind her. Ever since she had found out that Blair had slept with Chuck Serena couldn't help but wonder why. She saw the changes in them both.

Blair had been happy, relaxed and more care-free. Chuck withheld his perverse charisma for his natural allure and she saw that he was happy too.

Serena picked at a strand of her hair before asking timidly, "B, I know this may not be the best time but why Chuck?"

Blair turned her eyes abruptly to Serena. She didn't look confrontational, just curious.

It was painful to think about him because out of everyone Chuck had always wanted her, except now.

She supposed she deserved it.

You can only antagonize someone for so long before they snap. And she had antagonized him far beyond when he should have snapped, she just never thought it would have hurt so much.

"I know he's not one of your favorite people and you don't have to admit it out loud but he's charming. He always has been. It's this dangerous kind of charm, nothing like Nate's. Nate is like...the Statue of Liberty."

Serena tried to contain her snicker but couldn't. "I have to make a note that spending too much time away from society is not good for wit."

Blair couldn't particularly blame her, the comparison was horrible but she still acted as if the comment was uncalled for. "Nate is like the Statue of Liberty because he's completely unwavering, this symbol of hope for the future to come, for the most part."

She sent a pointed glance to Serena who cringed. "But Chuck, he's completely unpredictable and even if you don't want to care, he's got this pull that draws you in. I don't know I can't really explain it. It's just that every time Nate messed up _again_ Chuck was there for me."

Serena nodded before yawning embarrassingly.

Blair laughed at her, "I know my life is boring. Nothing ever exciting ever seems to happen to me, so you should be running along. It is nine o'clock after all, bed time."

Serena swatted at her, "Yeah, my life is boring too. And I'm sorry that for some reason I can't stay awake, maybe it has something to do with the early morning breakfast call."

Blair rolled her eyes, "Please don't try to pawn off your late night activities with Brooklyn onto me."

Serena grinned, "Night then. Wish me luck for tomorrow; I'll call if I survive."

Blair waved in response, "Good luck and I'll need some too. Don't forget I'm going biking!"

With one last head shake Serena exited the room. Blair slipped into her bed with a small smile on her face, she was going to go out tomorrow and she was going to hold her head up high.

She was a Waldorf and she wouldn't back down.

* * *

As she strode down the street the next morning, her full length coat flapping in the wind she felt confident. Who was some online gossip monger to ruin her life? 

She felt good for a whole three minutes before she caught sigh of Kati and Isabel giggling and walking together. Blair averted her eyes but knew they saw her and could just feel them scrabbling for their phones.

Losing any sense of assurance she had Blair dove into the nearest doorway silently praying it wasn't an Ann Taylor Loft or Carter's.

Luckily it was only the Palace. She sighed in relief, she could just pretend that she had forgotten Serena already had plans, and maybe the front desk could help her find a bicycle shop.

She stepped up to the desk and politely asked if they could locate a bicycle shop, preferably no where near the vicinity.

As she waited Blair took a seat in one of the expensive chairs placed within the lobby. She fiddled with her coat fastenings when a blonde figure stepped into her view. "Blair! How lovely to see you. I hope you're not looking for Serena, she's not in right now."

Blair smiled at Mrs. Van Der Woodsen soon to be Bass. "Oh, right! I must have forgotten. Thanks for reminding me. I'm just checking something at the desk before I go then."

The man held out a pad of paper to her and she grabbed the address, "Thank you."

Lily peered at the name, "You're buying a bike? How are you getting to that part of town?"

Blair shrugged, "I had been planning on taking a cab."

She was stared at dubiously, "That would be such a waste! Why don't you ride with us? Bart and I are going to lunch; we could drop you off on the way."

Blair was about to accept before she caught sight of Bart Bass rounding the corner, with his son in tow.

Chuck had his hands in his pockets but he hadn't looked in her direction yet. "Oh, really, I couldn't. I'll just leave now; I wouldn't want to delay you."

She froze in place as Mrs. Van Der Woodsen took her hand, "Now Blair, really. It's no problem and company will do Chuck some good. He's been _brooding_ a lot lately."

Blair tried not to cry in frustration so instead she took the few seconds to compose her face for the encounter.

Mr. Bass gazed at her interestingly before Lily explained, "Blair was going to buy a bike downtown but she was going to take a cab!"

Chuck's head shot up at her name but she didn't notice, she was too busy pointedly focusing on the address between her fingers.

Mr. Bass put a hand on her shoulder, "Nonsense, we'll drop you off along the way."

He took his fiancé's hand and led her out the doors leaving Chuck and Blair by themselves. She glanced at him quickly and he kept his eyes trained forward, if he was going to do this he couldn't cave on the first sign of resistance.

They trailed out to the limo when Chuck caught the glint of a raised cell phone. It was poised and waiting for a picture.

He shifted his body to block Blair from view as he helped her into the limo. She masked her surprise at the sudden show of niceties before glancing through the tinted windows and seeing Kati and Is hovering nearby and armed.

Blair rolled her eyes; she wasn't quite sure if he was protecting her or if he was protecting himself.

The ride through town was excruciating.

Chuck forced himself not to look at her even though he wanted to. He wanted to so badly.

Blair tried to pretend she wasn't ready to jump out of a moving vehicle at any moment.

They finally reached the street she needed and Blair nearly fell out of the door in her haste, "Thank you so much for the ride. I appreciate it."

Bart nodded to her and they began driving again. Once alone on the sidewalk she let a breath out in relief.

The limo reached a stoplight before Mr. Bass gave his son an intrusive look, "I'm not sure about this."

Chuck sighed heavily, "About what?"

Bart watched Blair's retreating figure, "Leaving Miss Waldorf alone in this part of town. Charles perhaps you should stay with her."

Chuck would have preferred that the limo drove off a bridge but he clenched his jaw, "Of course father."

He slammed the door behind him and caught up with Blair easily.

He didn't say a word, he didn't know what to say and they walked like that for a block. Finally Blair noticed that a strange color was being reflected somewhere behind her no matter where she walked and she turned around.

Upon seeing Chuck, it was his scarf she had seen, she became rooted to the spot.

They stared at each other for a while before she choked out, "This is a whole new level of stalking, even for you."

Chuck tried not to smile, "My father thought the area was unsafe and that I should stay with you."

Blair nodded curtly, "Well I don't see why you should care. You'd be proven wrong if I was dragged into an alley, somebody would want me then."

He didn't respond but as Blair gazed at him she saw in his eyes what he had been struggling to hide at the bar.

The confusion, the guilt, the doubt, the regret, the hope and maybe even the love?

Her face softened as he quickly averted his eyes. Chuck saw that she was going to start talking to him again but she couldn't. Then everything he had done so far would be for nothing.

Using the one piece of information he knew would guarantee her hatred he shot out, "I'm the one that told Gossip Girl."

Blair felt an encompassing numbness spread through her body and turned on her heel to leave him where he stood. Chuck was the reason that everything had fallen apart, it made sense.

As she stomped away she convinced herself it made sense but she slipped up.

She glanced in the glass behind her and saw his face. Blair blamed it on the fact that she had been away from society for such a stretch that she broke the cardinal rule. It was the rule she had practically invented, never look back.

She tried to talk herself into walking away but it didn't make sense.

Why would he tell her now of all times. Blair turned herself around and walked right up to him. "Why?" She demanded.

He gazed at her in bewilderment as to why she came back. It didn't help his resolve that she kept showing signs of wanting his attention, "I was angry that you-"

Blair cut him off. "Not why you told Gossip Girl, why you just told me now. I thought Jenny snitched, even if she would have denied it I would have thought she was lying, why did you tell me?"

Chuck rolled his eyes angrily, "Of course, at the Debutante Ball you _tell_ me what my motives were and got them completely wrong but _now_ you care. Now when you need to walk away that's when you come back."

Blair balled her hands into fists in frustration, "Since I'm not getting it, why don't you explain it then Chuck!"

He stepped towards her menacingly, "You don't want to hear it!"

She stood her ground now matter how much she felt like stumbling back and hissed out, "Try me."

"I didn't ruin your cotillion for 'my own amusement'. I didn't mean to ruin it at all but I did because I wanted you. I didn't want Nate to call for you and have you go running into his arms without one look behind, which you did anyway! And then you come to me and tell me I'm the last resort. Your last option possible. Ranked even lower than Nathaniel fucking Archibald, who screwed your best friend while you were dating and doesn't seem to realize the parallel situations.

Can you imagine if I said, 'Oh Blair just come here, I'll make it all better' what would have happened. You would have found out eventually that I told Gossip Girl and you would have been furious _and_ you're waiting for Nate. I know you are. I can't just take back what I said by apologizing. If you hate me you can have your future. So why can't you, just once, listen to me? I'm trying to help you!"

Blair couldn't speak. "You...You tried to push me away so I could be happy?"

Chuck sighed; he had royally screwed this up already, why not? "Yes Blair. Even when I deliberately try to ruin your life I'm still looking out for you. How messed up is that?"

She threw her arms around him and sobbed into his shoulder, "You're such an asshole!"

He frowned and tried to signal that Blair was actually alright to the people in the street who were gazing at her with concern. "Thanks Blair, I missed you too."

She shook her head at him smiling through her tears, "Whether you know it or not you already apologized. Self-sacrifice does have its perks. "

Chuck stared at her, "You don't have to lie to make me feel better, as long as we're talking again I'm good."

Blair smiled into his coat, "Really, I'm not lying. It's kind of ridiculous really; Nate broke up with both of us so why not stick together. And I'm not waiting for him to come back. You're right, if he's so completely blind to not see the parallels that I forgave for, than he's more idiotic than I thought. "

Chuck shrugged, "I don't think that's feasible."

Blair wiped away the remains of her tears, "So are you going to learn how to ride a bike with me or what?"

* * *

A/N: Hopefully that wasn't too out of character. The ending of 1.13 tore my heart and I knew that the way to mend it was an over- abundance of fluff. And if you're just itching to find out how I can possibly make this any fluffier wait until I get to explaining the title. Reviews are an excellent motivation now that I'm doing multiple chapters, eh? 


	2. The Fundamentals of Bike Riding

A/N: And here's Chapter Two! Thanks for all the positive feedback, its excellent motivation to keep on task, with that said I wouldn't mind one bit if you kept it up.

* * *

Chuck glared at a boy a few years younger than them as his wandering gaze landed on Blair.

She rolled her eyes at him, "Good thing you're here, I wouldn't have been able to handle that."

She pushed the door open to the bike shop checking the time as she did so, this wouldn't take too long. Blair figured they'd walk in pick one and be back out in no time.

This wasn't like buying shoes, it was a _bike_.

Once she saw the racks filled with all the possibilities she began to have her doubts.

Chuck surveyed the store dubiously, "Who the hell needs this many options for a tube of metal with wheels?"

Blair tugged him along with her as she tapped a scraggly-haired man on the shoulder. He was dressed in an obnoxious shade of yellow emblazoned with the store's logo.

"Why hello! My name is Karl, how can I help you?"

She tried to keep focused on her task rather than it looked like the man hadn't showered in over a month.

After the technicalities were hammered out and colors were decided upon both Chuck and Blair were standing beside the bikes of their choice.

Karl crossed his arms pleased that he had helped his customers so well. "Is there anything else you need then?"

Chuck glanced around the deserted store, "If you have the spare time I'd be willing to pay you for an introduction on how to ride."

Blair nodded behind him. Ignoring that Karl had never bathed; he seemed to know something about bikes. As seeing her familiarity with bike riding went into the negatives, any assistance would be better than none.

Karl shrugged and showed them how to mount and stay balanced before letting them have a turn.

Blair nudged Chuck towards his bike, "You can go first."

He sent her an exasperated look but still got onto the bike. After sitting precariously on the seat he began to pedal.

He gained momentum and seconds later Chuck was riding comfortably around the store.

Karl clapped exuberantly, "Great job!"

Blair crossed her arms in an irritated manner before glaring at him, "Yeah right you've never ridden a bike before."

Chuck circled around her ostentatiously, "Blair, we grew up together, you know I haven't. You're just jealous that I've caught on so well."

Blair rolled her eyes, "Please, it can't be that hard if you can do it." In a huff she tried to swing herself up onto her bike, not even getting seated before toppling sideways.

Karl sent her a sympathetic look, "Don't worry. Some people just have a natural rhythm. You'll catch on soon enough."

Blair took a deep breath, mentally restraining herself from offering him a sample bottle of shampoo, as Chuck grinned widely, "My natural rhythm was pretty rough, wasn't it Blair? But I can help you get yours."

Karl smiled along completely oblivious to the innuendo as she tried to ignore the comment. The fact that her cheeks were reddening wasn't doing much to help.

Chuck's grin only got wider, "So, do you think we should get her a pair of training wheels?"

Blair widened her eyes and scoffed, "I don't need training wheels!"

Within her peripheral vision she saw Karl sheepishly pick up a box, "They wouldn't be a bad idea."

Chuck motioned towards Blair's bike, "Could you attach them now then?"

Karl got to work and Blair snorted as Chuck hopped off his bike secretly wishing that he would face-plant.

They headed to the counter as he bent down to inspect the wheels, "And will these mark up hard wood flooring?"

Karl shook his head, "No sir, you're getting top of the line, no marks or skids."

Blair lifted an eyebrow at him, "Why would you ride your bike on wood flooring?"

Chuck whipped out his credit card and held it across Blair to block her from stepping forward, "Unless you wanted to take your spills from a bike with training wheels on a busy sidewalk for passerby to see...I thought it'd be a better idea if we just used my suite."

She had been ready to mock him for wanting to ride his bike indoors but of course he stole her thunder by actually being considerate.

Blair tried handing Karl her credit card too, "We're paying separately."

Chuck gave her a look, then he gave Karl a look. Blair gave him a look right back before giving Karl a look. Karl scratched his head and looked at them both.

Nobody wavered and Chuck sighed, "Blair really, I'll pay."

She pushed her credit card closer to Karl, "I haven't paid for anything in weeks! Do you want to know what I did yesterday?"

Chuck tried not to smirk but she had set herself up, "Karl?"

Karl, who was directly involved this time, missed yet another innuendo and Blair lost some of her stride, "Chuck! I'm going to pretend you never said that and go on, yesterday I made a five thousand piece puzzle."

Chuck snorted, "So? I watched Romeo and Juliet, for fourteen hours."

Blair frowned, "I tried learning how to knit."

Offering his credit card over Blair's with an air of victory he announced, "I willingly picked out color pallets for the wedding."

She fell silent before begrudgingly putting her card away, "You win."

Not that the task alone was mind numbingly boring, but it was widely known that Mrs. Van Der Woodsen had a very fickle mind for the color spectrum. When Serena had wanted to paint her room in fifth grade instead of using swatches or cards, the entire room was painted, eight different times before Lily was satisfied.

Chuck dialed his driver and informed him of their location before they thanked Karl and wheeled the bikes outside.

The limo pulled up smoothly and Chuck looked calculatingly from the door to their bikes, "This is going to be interesting."

Blair snickered slightly, "I'm looking forward to getting them into the hotel."

First Chuck tossed in the safety gear Karl had roped them into, then he lifted Blair's bike on his shoulder and tried to tilt it through the doorway.

After a few minutes of maneuvering it was inside and he passed his through as well.

The driver watched in amusement as the two teenagers struggled to find a comfortable way to sit jammed beside the bikes.

Blair ended up half on top of Chuck and half on top of a pair of handle bars.

While not as tortuous as the ride to the shop Blair was still in a bad mood. She swore she heard the driver laughing under his breath every time a turn knocked her further onto Chuck.

She tried to pretend she hardly noticed but if he had checked her pulse, her heart was beating so hard she was sure she would crack a rib.

Chuck too faked indifference to the contact but was failing miserably. The give away was his sharp intake of breath when Blair tried to right herself and touched his hand.

As they started getting closer to the Palace, Chuck gazed around the packed limo hesitantly. How were he, Blair, and two bikes going to get out of the limo, into an elevator and then his suite?

Blair turned to look at him and saw his doubtful expression, "I'm guessing just up and riding the bikes through the lobby would be a no go?"

Chuck grinned, "Not necessarily, the deciding factor would be you. Do you think you can handle it? Those training wheels would be getting some serious rotations."

Suddenly Blair was back at Victrola, right beside Chuck Bass with a challenge clear on his face, _"I know you won't do it."_

She never was able to turn down a dare.

Disentangling herself from Chuck, and the handlebars, she threw the door open and tugged her bike onto the sidewalk. She hopped up onto the seat before running out of whatever drive she had.

Chuck dragged his own bike as well before slamming the door shut and swinging himself up.

He looked towards Blair who was pretending she wasn't frozen in place, "What if I fall?"

Chuck took a hold of her of her bike, "Blair, the training wheels keep you balanced. There's nothing more, you just have to go for it."

She stared at him blankly and he leaned closer to her, "How are you going to learn without training wheels if you won't even ride with them? You can't worry about what might happen, you just need to do what _you_ want to do."

Blair wasn't so sure he was talking about learning how to bike anymore. She gave him a small smile that looked more like a grimace and he laughed, "I promise I won't let you fall."

He started towards the doors and Blair puttered along with him. The doorman raised his eyebrows at them. "Mr. Bass, Miss Waldorf."

Chuck saluted him in greeting, "So, do you think Dexter will have a heart attack?"

The man laughed loudly, "At the very least." He held the doors open once they were close enough and watched as Chuck rocketed by and Blair slowly followed after him.

Chuck hit the breaks to match his pace with Blair so she didn't catch the brunt of the blow, "No matter what happens you keep pedaling, alright?"

Blair bit her lip as she shot him a worried glare, "You're saying it like there's no chance to make it out alive."

He only shrugged unhelpfully and grabbed her handlebars to keep her up to his speed.

Dexter flipped through the papers at his desk after hanging up the phone. He was the head honcho as far as it went for the Palace.

Nothing got by him.

It was right then that Chuck and Blair whirled by his desk in a rush of pumping legs.

Dexter gripped the counter tightly, "Mr. Bass! What exactly do you think you're doing?"

Chuck smiled widely before glancing to make sure Blair hadn't stopped; "What was that? Dexter, why are you telling me your favorite restaurant? I already know how you enjoy your Friday nights at that nice Italian place two blocks down."

Dexter stared at him unresponsively; he supposed as a whole riding bicycles through the lobby wasn't too horrible.

Then he considered the numerous other situations Chuck had thrown the Palace into and comparatively this was quite welcome.

He really wished the boss' son was better behaved. "When a horde of bratty kids try to ride through the lobby I'm turning your father straight to you."

Chuck shot him a parting smirk before winking at Blair, "You just need you know how to handle these things."

Blair snorted, "Just three minutes ago you were practically preparing to give me your scarf in case of death."

Chuck smoothly leapt off his bike to hit the elevator button, "That was before I remembered old Dex has a forgiving nature when bribed with pesto shrimp."

She snickered at him before the doors slid open and Chuck motioned her forward. They both rode in and she pressed the floor number once he was settled.

Irritating elevator music floated through the enclosure and Chuck hummed along, nodding to the beat.

He shook his head after the song ended, "Do you think I could convince my Dad to spice up this riding music? I'm sickened that I know the repertoire."

Blair laughed as she finally relaxed her grip on the bike handles, "I can definitely see Bart going for the new Britney album. I could back you up on it if you'd like."

Chuck grinned at her when the doors dinged open and a man with a briefcase stepped forward before noticing what was in the elevator exactly.

He frowned at the lack of space and the two teenagers staring at him curiously, "I think I'll wait."

Blair smiled apologetically and the next time the doors opened it was on Chuck's floor. He sped ahead of her and opened the suite.

She took her time getting down the hall before Chuck stuck his head around the corner, "Jesus, Blair, are you going to get here some time soon or can I close the door?"

She made a face at him and nudged her elbow into his stomach as she entered the room. Sick of the bike already Blair got off and sat on the couch.

Chuck tossed the safety gear at her and Blair picked each piece up with distaste, "Do I have to wear all of this?"

He nodded enthusiastically and she threw one of the wrist pads at his head.

After flat out refusing to put any of the items on Blair was once again seated atop her bike.

"So_Master of the Bicycle_, start teaching."

Chuck rolled his eyes at her, "Real biking would mean ditching the training wheels."

She pursed her lips as he stared at her, a crooked smirk on his face. Kneeling down she unscrewed the training wheels with her fingernails and tossed them onto the counter.

Chuck watched her in astonishment as she met his eyes, "Let's get going then."

He gave her an authentic smile and offered his hand to help her back up. "You'll catch on quick Waldorf; it's easy once you know what you're supposed to do."

Blair nodded and slowly moved forward before the front wheel careened side to side and she tipped over.

Chuck grabbed her waist effectively stopping her from crashing to the floor. "This may take a little longer than I had expected."

She glared, not bothering to thank him as he righted her bike, "You know some kids take years to learn how to ride a bike."

Chuck pushed her handlebars back so they were facing the right direction, "Well those kids obviously were not being taught by Chuck Bass."

* * *

Two hours later Blair could almost go a whole foot in a straight line without falling. 

She threw her hands up angrily, fed up with the entire process, "Chuck! Can we please take a break now?"

He crossed his arms, Chuck was low on patience; it had never been one of his better qualities, but he'd be damned if she couldn't ride that bike before she left his suite.

Conveniently for her, Blair's phone started ringing and she reached for it before Chuck snatched it away.

She tried to protest and he pointed to his chest, she had taken a particularly nasty spill but true to his word, Chuck didn't let her fall.

He threw himself under the bike and in turn was rewarded with getting the wind knocked out of him, his shirt getting caught in the spokes and a bruise on the sternum from the gear shifter.

Blair grumbled under her breath as he glanced at the screen and picked up earnestly, "Hello Serena."

Serena paused for a moment in confusion looking at the phone making sure she had dialed the right number. Her grandmother had gone to the bathroom and she was sure they'd be done in about half hour.

She had wanted to see what Blair was doing, apparently she was with Chuck. Serena wasn't sure if that a was a good thing or not. "Chuck?"

He grinned at Blair who was glaring at him, arms crossed, "Yes?"

"Why are you picking up Blair's phone?"

He skillfully avoided Blair as she took another try at riding, "For my safety, Blair's and every possession within my residence I will not allow Blair to talk on the phone while controlling a bicycle."

Serena stifled her giggles in her hand, "She went through with it?"

Chuck watched Blair nearly flip over the handlebars and grabbed her arm, "If you can call it that. Hey Van Der Woodsen, you have a bike don't you?"

Serena's eyes lit up, "Oh! It's in storage a few streets away from the Palace. Could I bring it over? How did you guys even get by Dexter?"

Blair made another huffing noise and Chuck motioned for her to get off the bike, "When should we meet you by storage?"

Serena checked her watch, "I'll be there in twenty." She had done her amends and was tired of her grandmother's attitude. There was also the tiny motivation to see how Chuck and Blair had made up.

They hung up and Chuck tossed the phone back to Blair, "Well, you're getting there. What do you say for a grand debut on my part?"

Blair raised her eyebrows, "A grand debut of what?"

He pulled his shirt up over his head and Blair raised her eyebrows, "Let me ask once again, a grand debut of what?"

Chuck tugged a new shirt on and got onto his bike waving her towards him, "Hop on."

She stepped back shaking her head, "No way."

With an eye roll Chuck reached for her and placed her on his handlebars. "Ready?"

Before she could answer he starting moving and she shrieked, pulling her legs up and gripping on tightly. Chuck looped an arm across her waist to steady her more, "Is that better?"

She turned to him slightly trying to convince herself of what she was saying, "Better that I won't fall, not because I enjoy having you touch me. Unfortunately I have no choice."

Chuck snorted, "Right, so are you ready?"

She shrugged as they shot to the elevator, past Dexter, and out onto the street.

Blair threw back her head as she laughed, the wind blowing in her face. She knew Chuck wouldn't let go and lifted her arms up as they weaved through pedestrians.

From a nearby shop window a cell phone camera was busy snapping.

Chuck started slowing down as they got near a cross walk. He stopped and Blair gave him a huge grin, "I haven't felt this free since..." She trailed off, they both knew she meant since Victrola but that brought up a delicate subject.

Chuck jabbed her in the side to keep the topic moving, "Imagine when you can ride all by yourself."

A little girl stared at the two of them wide-eyed. The boy who was smiling and nudging the girl on the front of his bike, who kept shrieking and laughing in turn, to nudge him back.

She had never seen people like them so close.

They were normally so poised and calm but the two of them were so happy and beautiful as they were that she couldn't look away. Blair felt someone watching and met the girl's gaze unabashedly.

She held up a hand to mock whisper to her, "This boy is a bad influence."

The girl giggled and Chuck gave her a charming grin making the girl blush and turn into her mother.

Blair smiled as she shook her head; Chuck was too appealing for his own good.

The light turned and he pedaled forward until they were outside of the storage units where they were to meet Serena.

Blair hopped off the bike and rubbed at her sore backside, "The only drawback would be the indents I no doubt have."

Chuck gazed at her innocently, "I could check for you."

She rolled his eyes then looked down at her ringing phone before picking up begrudgingly, "Yes Mother?"

Chuck politely turned away, while listening to every word. He caught a disquieting bit that sounded like 'You haven't decided to dash of to France have you?'

Once Blair hung up he cocked an eyebrow at her.

"You almost ran?"

Blair tried to brush it off casually, "Almost, Serena convinced me to stay."

He snorted at the irony of Serena convincing her to stay, "It's a good thing too, can't have you getting mixed up in who's allowed to run away from their problems."

She frowned at him strangely, "Was that a jab at Serena?"

Chuck shook his head, "No, here, let me explain. In the complicated square of lies and fornication that happened there are two categories. Serena and I are in one and you and Nate are in the other.

Serena slept with her best friend's boyfriend, and while my case is slightly altered, you two made up soon enough; so that I slept with my best friend's girlfriend. Meaning Nate slept with his girlfriend's best friend and you slept with your boyfriend's best friend. You keeping up?"

Blair rolled her eyes at him, "You sound like a middle school girl and they're practically the same thing."

He shook a finger at her, "To some it may seem that way, but I've explained the difference and the biggest one by far is that it's only cleared for the friend who slept with the one in a relationship to run away from their problems. Obviously you missed the memo, I'm glad Serena straightened you out."

She swatted at his head as a cab pulled up and a golden head emerged.

Serena pulled Blair into a hug immediately before wrinkling her nose at Chuck's open arms and settling with a pat on the shoulder, "It's good to see you two outdoors for a change."

She whipped out a key and ran to the unit she needed before disappearing and stumbling back out alongside a dusty bike.

Chuck helped Blair back up onto the bike and Serena, after brushing hers off, got on hers. "Back to the hotel?"

The venture back caught even more attention as seeing both Serena _and_ Blair were screeching and all three bike riders were undeniably attractive.

Chuck linked arms with Serena for a while before people began swearing at them for nearly decapitating a line of pedestrians.

More loaded cell phones captured their shots.

Dexter looked up hearing screams and laughter to see Mr. Bass once again with Miss Waldorf on top of his bicycle and Miss Van Der Woodsen next to him. He lifted his eyes upwards and sighed.

Serena waved innocently, "Dexter! I haven't seen you wear a new tie lately? I think that Brooks Brother's could really help you out!"

Dexter looked at Blair determinedly, "I am not a pushover, but it's difficult to argue with personal acquaintances of the boss."

Blair pretended to zip her lips, "I have no clue what just happened."

Dexter nodded at her appreciatively before the group sped to the elevators. They had just managed to get through the doorway when all three of their cell phones began to buzz.

_Gossip Girl here, looks like B and C have decided to come out and play with S. Sorry N seems like this bicycle is only built for three._

The message was followed by two shots. The first was of Blair with her arms and head thrown back riding on the front of Chuck's bike. The second was when Serena and Chuck had hooked arms, creating hazardous road conditions.

None of them said a word as they stared at the post. Serena looked up with a slight smile, "I suppose as far as gossip goes this is nothing."

Blair threw her phone onto the couch in irritation, "Why can't we ever just go out and do something without being tracked? This isn't bad, but how many times has a picture been taken and then Gossip Girl twists something completely normal into a huge scandal."

Chuck hadn't moved his eyes from the screen, a devious light in his eyes. Serena nudged Blair with a worried expression motioning to Chuck.

Blair smiled gleefully as she saw him scheming, "What are you planning?"

He looked up at her with a slight smirk, "It was yours actually. It's like you said, take a picture and it gets distorted into the worst possible situation. What do you say to taking everyone down from the inside?"

Blair's lips upturned lethally as she thought over the idea, "It's perfect!"

Serena looked between the two apprehensively, "Gossip Girl shouldn't have been talking about us biking, she should have been warning people. With you two working together..."

Chuck finally put his phone down, "Its ok S, we know you've reformed. We wouldn't want to dirty your efforts with our ruthless revenge."

Serena pushed her hair back, falling right into the trap, "Hey! I am in on this. We're going to use Gossip Girl against them; no one will see it coming."

Blair hugged Serena tightly, "Oh! I knew there was still some cruelty left in there somewhere!"

Chuck rolled his eyes, "No one needs to possess cruelty to dislike Hazel, it's a gut reaction."

Blair couldn't help but glow at the thought of revenge.

It was going to hit them so hard there won't be time to react. This was going to destroy the social ranks with its own favorite weapon.

Everyone had better take a good look around because the Upper East Side was about to be taken by storm.

* * *

A/N: I tried to make it longer to make up for the break between my last update. This one was fluffier than the last so I apologize if I disappointed you with the airy banter and bike riding. Review please! Its obvious I have no shame, I've asked for them twice in the same post. 


	3. No More Tears I Will Think Upon Revenge

* * *

A/N: I had massive writer's block but to compensate I'm providing you all with this monstrous chapter. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Gossip Girl, please, if I did there would be none of this nonsense about Blair going back to Nate. I also can not take credit for the title of this chapter, it is a quote from the gloriously vengeful Mary Queen of Scots. Although I had to edit it for the title pull down menu, that's always irritating.

* * *

**No More Tears Now; I Will Think Upon Revenge**

The steps of Constance Billard and St. Jude's were flooded with whispers and pointed fingers about the latest gossip. Blair walked past them all, Serena at her side, and met the stares of anyone who chanced a quick peek in her direction.

Just knowing that soon enough everything would be in thrown into chaos gave her a certain tranquil air.

It always did.

She peeled back her yogurt lid and ate a spoonful as Serena followed suit, "So did I or did I not tell you the strawberry was just as good if not better than the blueberry?"

It was collectively agreed upon that they needed to branch away from lemon.

Blair wrinkled her nose, "I don't think so, the strawberry is _ok_ at the most, but no where near the level of blueberry."

The two girls ate separated from the rest; beautiful figures just along the edges of where they used to stand.

The giggles were still rampant and increased tenfold as Chuck's limo pulled up. Since the fight with Nate he had been arriving barely before school started in order to avoid loitering time in which he had no one to talk to.

Now, however, he had business to attend to.

He made his way over to Blair and Serena who were still avidly arguing artificial fruit flavors until he rolled his eyes. "Ladies, it seems I've forgotten my yogurt."

Blair held up her spoon condemningly, "Well, I guess that means you can't sit with us."

He grinned and sat beside her causing Blair to shuffle over once their arms brushed, "Alright, now that we know what we're doing we need to figure out how. You need to decide what aspect you're going to exploit."

She twirled her yogurt between her fingers as her eyes narrowed in on Jenny Humphrey's blonde head. Blair nodded and took another spoonful, "Will do, S, you should take note too then we can compare."

Serena nodded absently, scanning the crowd for Dan, before turning back to focus on what Blair was saying.

Once he got onto the premises Dan hopped up the stairs trying to spot his girlfriend. He had seen the pictures on Gossip Girl and he wasn't jealous.

Of course he wasn't _jealous_ that Serena was spending time with Chuck Bass. They were going to be related soon so it wasn't as if, and then his eyes widened as he spotted Serena sitting beside Blair and Chuck.

Chuck noticed a hole being burned into the side of his head and turned to see Brooklyn marching over.

He nudged Serena's knee and tipped his head to the side. She looked over and a smile broke across her face as she waved him closer, "Dan! Over here!"

Simultaneously, Hazel made a show of accidentally bumping into Blair, engaging the attention of the entire student body.

After righting her nearly lost yogurt Blair looked up impassively, "It's nice to see that being at the top hasn't enlarged your ego but your calves instead."

Hazel smirked and lifted an eyebrow, "I am at the top aren't I? And you're right where you should be." She cast a superior look around their position at the bottom of the stairs.

Dan walked up in time to hear the comment and knew from the way that Blair's hands were balled into tiny fists that unless he stepped in either Serena would shove Hazel down the stairs or Chuck would asphyxiate her with his scarf.

He squeezed Serena's shoulder reassuringly before offering up, "This is a nice spot, the closer you get to the top the more bird crap you have to look out for."

Hazel shot them all a dirty look before floating away, Kati and Is at her sides.

Chuck begrudgingly nodded towards Dan, a brief approval of his efforts. Blair laughed slightly as Dan shrugged and the two looked away, unsure of whether or not they were allowed to associate.

Serena pulled Dan down beside her and he cast another look at Chuck who was obliviously refolding the edges of his sleeves. Blair wasn't so blind though and grabbed Chuck's arm, "Come on, we have to relocate so the _couple_ can have a nice chat."

Serena turned to Dan expectantly with a curious look as she stuck her tongue out at Blair.

Dan waved to her appreciatively and took a breath before he began his tirade, "So I know it's stupid and I shouldn't even worry about it, but why are you suddenly spending so much time with Chuck?"

She didn't know what she had been expecting but it definitely wasn't this.

Serena snorted, "Blair and Chuck made up and as seeing I'm friends with Blair... I know that given his record you're not exactly going to offer him a dinner invitation but he's not a bad guy.

Especially with Blair around, he's more engaging and endearing. You have to understand he doesn't get along with many people but if Chuck does get along with you, he makes sure you're taken care of."

Dan watched her animated expression dubiously, "That was reassuring to me how?"

She giggled and rolled her eyes lacing her fingers with his.

Chuck and Blair watched them from several feet away. "They're definitely talking about you, I've seen them mouth Chuck like four times."

He leaned back and shrugged, "What can I say? I'm irresistible."

Blair rolled her eyes, "No, you're quite resistible."

He glowered at her as she smirked and shifted her headband when he noticed a glint, "Are those new earrings?"

Blair touched them at his mention, a pleasantly surprised smile on her lips. Roman had sent them. She wasn't sure if she was warming up to him because she actually liked him or because he was buttering her up.

Every month Blair's father sent a 'Sorry I ditched you for a sexy male model' present and apparently Roman wanted to start a 'Sorry I'm the sexy male model your Dad ditched you for' one too.

Either way, they were stunning earrings. "They're from France, should I have some sent over for you too? We could match!"

Chuck rubbed at his earlobes affectionately, "No thank you, my lobes are much better off puncture-free."

The two continued on their conversation, completely unaware that they were being watched.

Nathaniel Archibald had always followed the appropriate protocol. So he wasn't quite sure how the protocol he had followed most recently left him completely abandoned.

According to the rules the moral justice of his actions should have punished the others and left him the winner.

Yet there he was, alone. There were plenty of people who surrounded him daily, perfectly willing to befriend him, but that wasn't what he craved. Nate had been best friends with Chuck since kindergarten and he had been dating Blair for nearly just as long. He had been closer to Chuck than he was his only family.

Those sorts of bonds aren't forged overnight and as he watched the two talk he couldn't believe he had broken them so easily. Sure he was pissed as hell, but what right did he have to pass judgment on infidelity, considering Blair didn't even cheat.

He supposed what really bothered him was Chuck's response to all of this.

There was no brushing this off as a fling, a mistake. He actually cared about her and Nate was too proud to admit that he was a bad boyfriend. Of course he knew that he was a without a doubt an awful boyfriend, but he was a good friend, at least he had been and he wanted to try and make this up.

No, he wasn't going to try; he _was_ going to fix things. He just needed to figure out the best way to apologize for his idiocy.

The warning bell rang scattering the masses and at that moment all of the Upper East Siders were just faces in the crowd, schoolchildren scampering to class.

Blair took advantage of the day planning where to, metaphorically speaking, kick them in the back of the knees then laugh, with four-inch heels clicking as she walked away.

Speaking metaphorically of course, although she did have a gorgeous pair of pointed Prada's in mind.

The attacks were simple and well-thought out with one goal; absolute annihilation.

From an outside perspective no one could ever detect an interference with the gossip. There were too many variables to blame anyone and far too much dependency on the site to cause suspicion.

* * *

It started with a lucky shot.

A text sent to Kati, whom everyone was fully aware often visited a gritty, out of the way Planned Parenthood. They offered the day after pill and Kati had always been forgetful.

The picture was merely of Kati, hands hovering over her stomach and in the background a shadowy sign reading the name of the establishment behind her.

Of course the innocent message sent to Gossip Girl along the lines of 'Looks like B started a new trend' wouldn't lead anyone to jump to conclusions.

Isabel was the next target; Serena made an innocent phone call to the credit card company questioning certain purchases.

Although she hid it well not many knew that Is bought knock-offs, until her entire charge history for two solid months was "accidentally" sent to Gossip Girl that is. Who would have thought she was the type?

Hazel's downfall was really the easiest because there was no manipulation involved; she had crafted her own headstone. All in all Hazel's take down was Blair's favorite, perhaps it was because the conniving wretch got tangled up in her own hypocrisy.

Hazel's fleeting power came to an abrupt halt once her interesting relationship with a professional _entertainer_ was uncovered. It was a video clip in fact that managed to draw all the conclusions for you, no need to make inferences.

These events took place over the course of the month.

The masses may have been unaware to the manipulation of their favorite gossip source, but it would have been painfully obvious if all three of the socialites were humiliated within one day.

The only one left to fall was Jenny Humphrey and Blair hadn't forgotten. Due to the way everything had occurred no social ranks were standing, a strange limbo was in place.

It only took a day or two before the allure of recognition and popularity was too much and Little J decided to take her stab at ruling the Upper East Side.

Blair was ecstatic that everything had worked out so well up this point. They had done their job flawlessly and she was glad to see that she still had it in her to destroy anyone in her way.

* * *

The lunch period had just started when Nate determinedly made his way over to where Chuck was sitting alone. The rest of the St. Jude population watched anticipating another fight as he approached.

"Hey, want to take a walk?"

It was a regular event for the two of them to skip out on campus during lunch but as seeing they hadn't been speaking for nearly a month neither had done so.

Chuck shrugged and got to his feet, curious as to what Nate wanted to say to him. Ignoring the stares the two slipped out through the hedges to the path that wound through the bordering neighborhood.

They walked in comfortable silence before Nate worked up the nerve to start talking. "So, let me clarify a few things. My name is Nate Archibald, my parents control nearly every decision I make, so when it's left to me I almost always make the wrong choice.

I don't do well under pressure; I'm not very good at making friends. It takes me an extraordinarily long time to put things together, I'm a coward and I've been told I'm a wuss-bag on more than one occasion. With that said, I miss you man."

Chuck grinned as he pulled Nate into a brief, yet still reputation-upholding hug. "I've missed you too, but I can say that without sounding like a wuss-bag because I'm cocky enough to pull it off."

Nate laughed and shook his head, "Man, have you considered how pathetic we are? I've realized I honest to God only have one friend."

Chuck jumped up to grab a leaf from a branch hanging above him, "Yeah, well I have a whopping three and you can too, you know."

Nate watched him curiously, "So obviously you and Blair have always been...close, but how are you and Serena getting along so well?"

In response Chuck shrugged, "I've mellowed out and she's still got some of that old rebel in there."

Nate smiled in a self-satisfied way, "I knew it."

Chuck frowned at him, "Obviously not since you just asked."

Shaking his head Nate kept grinning, "No, you've got it bad."

Chuck punched him in the shoulder, "I think it's too early for you to be making fun of me about your ex."

Nate only grinned wider, "No it's not. She was miserable with me but she's not when she's with you. And I may not be in love with Blair but I'll always care about her and I want to see her happy.

It just so happens that you're my best friend who I also want to be happy and both could work out because, you totally have it bad."

He glanced down at his phone noticing the time, lunch was almost over. They made their way back up the path and into the school, taking their seats in class ten minutes after it started while the teacher looked up disapprovingly.

School let out and Chuck brought Nate along with him to meet Blair and Serena, "You just need to get it over with now and don't say anything stupid."

Nate half-heartedly shot him a glare, "Thanks."

People stared as Chuck and Nate walked by, Serena shamefully had to admit that she was one of them. "Oh my God! Chuck and Nate are walking over here, together!"

Blair forced herself not to look and both she and Serena tried to act like they hadn't realized the two were on their way over.

Chuck pushed Nate forwards, "Now I think everyone here remembers Nate? He's always been a little slow on the up-take so you'll have to forgive him for not realizing we all did apologies _last_ month."

Nate smiled slightly and Serena threw her arms around him, "At least he caught on, remember that time when we all used 'study for the history exam' as code for party at Chuck's suite and Nate never caught on, so he brought his books along every time."

The three snickered as Nate tried to defend himself, "Hey, nobody ever told me that it was a code!"

Serena rolled her eyes, "Uh-huh, sure."

She and Chuck both looked at each other at the same time and exchanged a subtle nod, "Chuck and I need to talk over there, about...the weather."

Chuck looked at her incredulously, "You have got to be kidding me? You just pulled the weather card?"

Blair grinned and nudged his shoulder, "Just go over there would you? The sooner you move the sooner Nate can grovel and then we can all go back to my place."

Nate hadn't looked Blair in the eyes yet and when he finally did he saw she was watching him expectantly but she wasn't angry. "Well...uh...Blair, there are so many things I should be apologizing for, but I'm sorry about what I said.

You know this by now but I don't always make the best choices. I...I haven't been in love with you for quite a while but I do still care about you a lot and I want to see you happy. I know now that I can't do that for you."

Blair gave him a quick hug as she tugged him towards Chuck and Serena, "Same here, Archibald. Now let's go so you can be let in on everything you've missed."

She could hardly believe it looking around her kitchen and seeing Serena, Chuck and Nate there like they used to be so many times before.

Dorota was so overjoyed to see Chuck and Nate in the house that she baked them a cake.

Chuck grinned at her cheekily, "And Dorota, you used to think I was the devils spawn."

To this Dorota shook a finger at him, "Who says my opinion changed?"

Blair snorted at his expression and pulled her laptop over, reveling in all the controversy she had stirred up. Nate caught a glimpse of the Gossip Girl page and waved his fork towards them all, "Can you believe what's been happening lately?"

Serena rolled her eyes, "Nate, we're the ones that made it all happen, of course we can."

Nate stared at them all in surprise, "Really?"

Chuck patted him on the shoulder while shaking his head, "What you didn't think we could? You are talking about a scorned Blair Waldorf here."

Blair snickered at Nate as he looked from each of their faces worriedly, "Were you planning on getting back at me too?"

Before anyone could answer Blair innocently dead-panned, "That's what this is. Dorota put laxatives in your cake and when you need to go to the bathroom there'll be no toilet paper. You'll have to go down the hall where you will be tar and feathered."

An ominous silence overtook the room before Serena burst out giggling. Blair started too and Nate breathed out in relief watching her so unreserved.

The Blair he had always known never joked around like this. Chuck grinned at him before eating another mouthful of cake, "Who says she's kidding?"

Nate stopped laughing abruptly, a worried expression adorning his face, "Really?"

The three snickered at him as Serena lightly punched his shoulder, "Of course she's kidding silly."

While their reunion was sweet it was brief.

Nate's mother called for him to come home, she had become exceedingly paranoid since her husband had been subjected to public humiliation. And of course, Dan drew Serena away, leaving Chuck and Blair alone in the kitchen with a large amount of cake and Dorota.

Blair pushed her plate away, aware she had already eaten two pieces and watched Chuck as he spun himself in his chair. She rolled her eyes as she checked the time, "Don't you have somewhere to be?"

He smirked at her and mockingly tweaked her nose, "Apparently the time we've spent apart has clouded your memory. Bart is the only one who occasionally requires my appearance and with Lily around, the occasions have gone from slim to none."

Blair nodded, of course she knew he didn't have anywhere else to be, half the reason she spent so much time with Chuck was because both of them were never wanted at home.

She eyed the cake and he served her another piece with a knowing smile as she grumbled but began eating anyways. "Do you think his Van Der-Bass union will last?"

Chuck carefully measured Blair's expression before answering, "I think my father is in love with her, and she's just doing it for convenience."

She raised her eyebrows at his assessment, "You really think he's in love?"

Chuck shrugged, "Well, my father has never been known for fidelity, even with my mother he...but he's trying, he's actually trying for her and he hasn't been with anyone else in a while.

So, yeah, I think he is in love with her. Either way, she's just using him, I'm not sure for what but she is."

Blair examined his face as he tiredly rubbed at his eyes. How his hair stuck up in the back, the way his jaw-line prominently jutted out, his lips, so perfectly full.

She shook her head in alarm to clear the thoughts as he lifted his eyes, "So we both know the real reason you want me here, what are you planning to do with Little Humphrey."

At first Blair thought he was about to say he knew she wanted to push him off his chair and climb on top of him but that was out of character for her, and potentially awkward with Dorota still in the kitchen.

She frowned at his insinuation, "Why would I need to talk to you about that? I could ask Serena, or Nate even."

He snorted, "Please, have you already forgotten? Nate and Jenny are best buddies. And Serena, while perfectly willing to get her hands dirty with everyone else will not help you take down her beloved's younger sister."

Blair pursed her lips, he was right of course, "So what do you suggest then?"

He grinned as he shrugged, "I don't know, that's why I was asking you. It's not like you have any background on her to exploit, everyone already knows her financial situation and she has no sexual escapades to condemn her."

Even as he spoke Blair realized she did have some background information.

The fact that she was trying so hard to please Nate proved that, but she'd have to work under his detection and Serena's. They wouldn't approve. If Blair had any compassion for her at all she would almost feel bad for her.

Oddly enough, she had none.

Chuck saw the wicked glint flaring up and waited for her to tell him what she was plotting, "We need to hit her below the belt, just like she did with us. There was more than just our reputations riding on the line, it needs to get under her skin and make her regret every messing with me."

She seemed satisfied with her proclamation, "So you're in with me on this?"

Chuck only smirked, "Just tell me what I need to do."

* * *

Serena started towards the cab, apologizing as she went but Blair grabbed her arm, "What, am I not invited?"

Serena stared at Blair in surprise, "You want to come by Dan's with me?"

Blair shrugged off Serena's shock, "I mean we're only picking him up aren't we? Why would I want to wait at the cafe alone for everyone to come when I can just come with you?"

Of course, she also had 'Destroy Jenny' on her list, right after 'Collect Dan for Coffee' but what Serena didn't know wouldn't hurt her.

The cab stopped outside the Humphrey abode and the two girls made their way up. Rufus answered the door as he ushered them inside enthusiastically, trying at the same time to make them taste his newest creation.

Dan heard, "No really, just try it, they're great", and ran out from his room to prevent anyone from being poisoned while he could help it.

He stopped short upon seeing Blair beside Serena but didn't ask any questions. Dan had discovered that less was more with Blair.

At hearing voices Jenny stuck her head out of her room, upon seeing Blair she was unwilling to back down. Jenny came into the kitchen with her head held high and cast her a scornful glance.

Rufus shrugged at the refusal to try his haphazard recipe and excused himself so they could do what they needed to do.

Dan eyed his sister carefully, she had changed so much that he wasn't even sure he knew who she was anymore, "I'll be ready in a minute, I just need to grab my coat. Oh and Serena, you left your English book in my room."

The two shared a secret smile before Serena glanced at Blair, "We'll be right back."

Blair raised her eyebrows at the hint, "If it's more than five minutes I'm leaving without you."

Serena snickered as she went down the hall, barely giving a second thought to leaving Jenny and Blair alone together. Jenny shuffled through the fridge pretending not to notice that Blair was watching her every move.

In as disarming a manner as possible Blair picked up her cell and hit the speed dial for Chuck's number. Gossip Girl had picked up that Nate had spoken with his former three comrades but nothing more had followed up.

No one knew that had all reinstated their friendship.

He answered just as he had reserved a table, "About time Waldorf, we just got a table, where are you?"

She casually glanced towards Jenny who was clearly trying to eavesdrop, "We're by Humphrey's right now, if the couple doesn't reemerge from the bedroom soon I'll just meet you and Nate and they'll catch up."

Jenny nearly dropped the carton of eggs she was shifting around in surprise. Blair was meeting up with Nate? Were they back together? Jenny had thought that lately Nate had been showing an interest in her.

Poor naïve Little J.

Once Blair hung up Jenny nastily gave her a once-over, "So you're showing your face in public now?"

She shrugged, "Well, I suppose, but it was _Natie's_ idea to go to coffee."

Jenny deflated a bit but tried to regain her footing, "You're such a bitch, talking with him as if you never betrayed him."

Blair only smiled pleasantly, "Aw, have I hit a nerve sweetie? Did you really think that Nate would go for you once I was out of the picture? That after dating since kindergarten he would just throw me aside and take you?

I'll always be a part of his life, even if we're not together. Don't flatter yourself; he has far better taste than back-stabbing, low-income, bitchy sellouts. Sorry I had to break it to you Little J."

Dan and Serena still hadn't come out so Blair gave her a mocking wave and shouted down the hall, "I'll meet you guys at the café!"

Jenny's bravado vanished. She stood immobile in the kitchen, trying not to cry until Blair was out of the room.

Walking victoriously out of the Humphrey's apartment she hailed a cab, a devious grin on her face. Now that she had emotionally disrupted Jenny, there was only a bag or two of more salt to rub into the wound.

Blair dialed Chuck back from the backseat trying to keep her manic grin in check, "I just crushed Little J's self-esteem."

He felt a swell of pride for her, "You'll have to elaborate some time, but I'll see you here then." The next part of the plan only required her presence; Gossip Girl would do the rest.

Nate gazed at him curiously but Chuck blew it off, "Just Blair saying she'd be here soon."

Nodding Nate nudged his elbow with his eyebrows waggling, "So have you two made up yet?"

Chuck nudged Nate back as he rolled his eyes, "We already have, moron."

His friend only snorted, "Come on, man, I mean have you really _made up_?"

Chuck smirked as he finally realized what Nate meant, "No, and I don't know if she's even interested anymore."

Before Nate could respond the door to the café opened and Blair took a seat across from the two with a broad grin on her face. "Hello, you two look dashing today."

She was alarmingly happy.

Soon after she removed her coat the doors jingled open again and Serena trailed in with Dan. Blair grinned in greeting, "So I take it you found your book S?"

She swatted at her as she easily took a seat pulling Dan down with her. Nate and Chuck gave him a brief nod.

They were falling back into routine, the easy friendship that made them best friends for years and they weren't quite ready to make an effort for Dan yet. It was a miracle in of itself that none of the three parties held any hostility.

Once the party was seated phones began snapping furtive pictures like no tomorrow. Blair couldn't keep the smile off her face as the clicks continued.

Soon enough their own phones buzzed and the message from Gossip Girl was displayed with a shot of them all at their table.

_Hey Upper East Siders,_

_To top off this Month of Mayhem we have all our favorites out for a nostalgic coffee binge. C and N are back to Besties and so it seems that N is welcomed back by B and S too. Predictably D accompanying S make this little table one of beautiful friendship._

_ Watch out Little J, you're the only one left standing and from the looks of that smile B is taking no prisoners._

_You Know You Love Me, XOXO_

_ Gossip Girl_

Blair raised her eyes triumphantly to see Chuck resting his steady gaze on her. She turned away, fighting against the heat threatening to rise in her cheeks.

Now that she had almost won back her crown she was going to have to watch herself. As she increasingly spent more time with Chuck she was putting herself at risk for grabbing him by the scarf and pushing him into the nearest closet.

Then again, who's stopping her? The idea did possess a reasonable amount of potential merit.

Serena interrupted her train of thought, "What are you thinking about?"

Blair shrugged innocently, as she hurriedly picked up the menu to hide her smirk, "Oh, nothing really."

* * *

A/N: Most likely I'll have to make this AU once the season starts up, which by the way is absolutely thrilling. I hope you rejoiced in Blair's revenge, I'm not very vindictive so I had difficulties making the take-downs cruel. Also I apologize for the lack of bicycles in this chapter, no worries they will be back and a lot of one-on-one CB interaction. Please review! It would make me inordinately happy.

* * *


	4. The Inevitable Has Finally Happened

A/N: So, uh, I'm sorry. I had this huge chunk of plot planned and then I ran out and had absolutely no where to go then I realized, Chuck and Blair hadn't gotten together yet, whoops. So here, let me fix that. Also, thank you, times an obscenely large power of ten for all the reviews!

* * *

**The Inevitable Has Finally Happened**

With everything in line Blair was dangerously close to nudging Jenny off her rickety throne.

She sat in one of the Van Der-Bass' newly refurbished arm-chairs helping Serena choose an outfit for the rehearsal dinner, for _next week_. Lily insisted everything was in order.

The strange thumping music coming from the other room drew her attention away again and Serena rolled her eyes. "Chuck is trying to teach Eric how to dance; I walked by earlier and was embarrassed _for_ them."

Lily smiled fondly at the mention of her son and soon-to-be step-son, "They're having fun Serena, let them be, after all it's not like they're dancing like that in public. I would have to step in if it went as far as that."

Blair tried to stifle her laughter envisioning Chuck doing his horrifically exaggerated pelvic thrusts. "Well, I can vouch that Chuck does do a decent sprinkler."

Both Van Der Woodsen women snickered at this bit of information and Chuck's head popped around the corner as he grinned at Blair broadly, "My sprinkler is the foundation of what all other sprinklers aspire to be."

Bart walked by shooting a perturbed look between his son and finance, "Please tell me you are not referring to a certain part of your body as a 'sprinkler' while conversing with Lily."

Chuck rolled his eyes and turned the music back on as Serena waggled her eyebrows and whispered under her breath, "Blair could also vouch for that sprinkler."

Blair cried out in indignation and lifted a pillow to throw at her head when Lily carefully pulled it from her grasp, "Not with the new lining Blair!" She handed her one of the older decorations from a chair around the corner, "But feel free to use this one."

Serena threw up her arms as Blair knocked the pillow straight into her face, "Mom!"

Lily shrugged and picked up her Chanel sunglasses before waving to the girls. "Love you sweetheart. Bart and I will be out for dinner; could you at least try and make the boys promise not to burn the hotel down?"

Serena sighed as she waved exasperatedly and turned to Blair. "So the green or the blue then? Oh whatever, what do you want to do tonight?"

Eric this time stuck his head around the corner, "Hang out with _us _of course."

Serena put a hand on Blair's shoulder to turn her away from him, "Really, let me ask again, what did you want to do tonight?"

Blair snickered as Eric made a face at the back of his sister's head, "You know we might need to join them; I mean we have to _try_ and help Eric out. Chuck is going to ruin any chances he has at dance floor wooing by showing him the pelvic thrusts."

Chuck shouted over the music in retaliation, "Yeah Waldorf, maybe you should be teaching him to dance. Your moves worked well last time didn't they?"

Blair's face flushed and she was glad only Serena was there is witness it. Why did he constantly bring up times when she was clearly inebriated. Who says, 'I've got moves'? It certainly hadn't been one of her finer lines.

Crossing her arms in a huff Blair finally yelled back, "Isn't the point to get 'under the thunder'?"

Serena stood with her eyebrows furrowed enjoying the verbal shouting match that was occurring over Reel 2 Real's 'I Like To Move It'.

Chuck's raucous laughter reverberated around the entire penthouse at her retort. He turned the music off and walked into the room a smirk on his face, "I had forgotten about under the thunder, that is sheer brilliance."

Serena rolled her eyes, "No actually it's probably the worst one, even horizontal tango is better than under the thunder."

Eric stepped into the argument, "That doesn't even rhyme! The rhyme is what makes it good."

Blair snorted as Serena tried to cover her ears, "I refuse to debate with my little brother over innuendos! Chuck, you're corrupting him!"

Eric raised his eyebrows, "Of course, before we moved in with Chuck I had never made jokes about sexual innuendos in my life."

Blair snickered and Chuck smirked before pointing down the hall, "You two can join us anytime, until Eric leaves of course."

Serena frowned, "Where are you going?"

Eric gave her an exasperated glance, "Sure rub it in my face. You already met with her, tonight I'm having dinner with Grandma."

Collectively the group offered him a wince. After patting him on the shoulder reassuringly Serena pulled Blair towards her room, "Thanks for the offer guys but no. I've decided we'll clean out my closet."

To Blair or Serena 'clean the closet' meant trying on every single item and then when putting everything back in making sure it was on the hanger properly.

Twenty minutes in and Serena's room was a whirlwind of bright garments. Blair twirled in the mirror dressed in a tiny, black-beaded flapper dress. "Why don't you wear this? It's gorgeous."

Serena frowned, "Oh! I bought that on vacation and just found it during the move. You can have it if you want, it looks better on you and it's very Audrey-on-a-mission."

Blair raised an eyebrow, "A mission for what?"

Serena burst into a fit of giggles, "A mission to get it on in a plush Palace bed with an old lover perhaps?"

She threw the hanger at Serena who dodged out of the way and pointed a finger to Blair, "You're awfully angry today."

Blair snorted, "And you're awfully obnoxious about Chuck today."

Serena dropped her voice, "Wait, did you guys do it in his suite?"

Crossing her arms Blair resolutely stared forward, "I refuse to divulge any information without anything in return."

Jumping onto the bed in the red, mini-dress she was wearing Serena pulled a pillow onto her lap, "I'll tell you about Dan and I if you tell me about you."

Blair bit her lip, "Me and who?"

Serena sent her a devious smirk, "Not to bring up a sore subject but I know how Nate was...I want to know about your first time! You waited for so long; you have to do it justice."

Blair begrudgingly sat herself down on the bed, "Okay, you first."

Serena then went on and on about Dan's birthday and her gift with the snow and then it really started snowing and who could have known? Blair fidgeted as she sighed, how can you follow such a romantic rendezvous with her tawdry affairs.

Soon enough, however, Serena was waiting, "Your turn! Tell me all the details, all of them."

Blair absently picked at her pillow, "Well, we were both slightly inebriated, I performed at his strip club and then I initiated hot dirty limo-sex."

Serena's shriek was piercing, "Dirty limo-sex! You lost your virginity having dirty limo-sex and I didn't know? How could you not have told me?"

Blair shrugged, "Well after my birthday when you brought up seeing me with Chuck you weren't exactly encouraging an elaboration on the subject."

The ringing of her phone made Serena flash an apologetic grin and pick up to who would have guessed, Dan. After it was clear this was going to be a while Blair silently got to her feet and crept out of the room.

She was headed for the kitchen but as she passed by Chuck's room she found herself inadvertently slowing down. Blair stood in the doorway hesitantly watching Chuck as he frowned over the floods of paper around him. Since when did Chuck Bass do schoolwork?

Finally he noticed her lurking and smirked as he got to his feet, coming closer to her than necessary as he closed the door. Trying to pretend she wasn't horrifically nervous of being alone in a room with him she cocked an eyebrow, "What are you doing?"

He grinned as he brought his mouth close to her ear and whispered, "Making you uncomfortable, I think its working what about you?"

She shoved him away from her and he laughed and went back to sitting on his bed, "There's plenty of room for you here."

Blair ignored the undertone and sat daintily on the far side of the bed. "What's all this?"

Chuck's smirk was replaced with a genuine smile, "Bart told me that if I cleaned up Victrola for some of his more conservative colleagues, he would use it as a business venue at the end of the month."

She grinned back, "So it's doing well then?"

Chuck nodded, "Yeah, it is."

Blair grabbed the sheet he had been scribbling on and saw 'Make them wear turtlenecks' with 'Only play Bart's elevator music'. She snickered and he couldn't help but join in, "I can't think of a way to tone it down without obliterating what makes up the essence of Victrola."

Blair looked up at him questioningly, "Could I give my opinion?"

Chuck widened his eyes, "I don't know why I didn't ask for it earlier! If anyone would know how to turn a burlesque club prude it would be you."

Blair waved a pen at him, "How can I still be considered a prude?"

He shrugged, "It's who you are, the fact that you're not one anymore has nothing to do with it."

She wrinkled her nose at him, "I may be mildly insulted but I can't quite tell."

After reading through some of the papers, most of which were logistical Blair pulled over a new sheet and began to write on it. Chuck leaned over to read it but she pulled it away, "I'll read it aloud when I'm done."

He rolled his eyes and interlocked his hands behind his head as he lied back on the bed. "Does Serena know you're in here?"

She shook her head absently, "No, she's talking to Dan, again. They should just set up one of those lame video game headsets with the transmitter so they can always keep in contact."

Chuck laughed as he watched her hovering on the edge of the bed, "You should have gotten her a set for Christmas. And Blair you have enough room to fit on the bed, without even touching me, you don't need to be falling off."

She shot him a venomous glare, "Who says I'm avoiding touching you?"

He shifted so his hand rested alongside her thigh and was rewarded with her squirming away a mere two seconds afterwards. "See?"

Blair puffed out indignantly and lied through her teeth, "Try again, I thought you were reaching for the paper."

He knew she was going to force herself to hold still so this time Chuck placed his hand gently on her thigh. She hadn't been expecting him to actually touch her and even though she commanded herself not to move she felt her face heating up and the skin beneath her tights burning at his touch.

Finally she wasn't able to take it and jerked her leg from his reach, "That still doesn't mean I'm avoiding touching you."

They fell silent and Chuck took the time to really look at her and notice what she was wearing, "You look...that's a nice dress."

Blair shot him a small smile when the door burst open and Serena let out a scream before covering her eyes, "Oh My God! Sorry I didn't know you were..."

The two looked at each other from opposite sides of the bed, stacks of paper between them and fully clothed. Blair grinned and rolled her eyes, "Serena, I know it's difficult but you'll have to control your reaction when looking at Chuck's face, you are living with him now."

Peeking through her fingers Serena realized nothing was going on and sheepishly shrugged, "Sorry, I saw figures on the bed and freaked out."

Chuck snorted as he turned back to his paperwork, "Go ahead Waldorf, you can go continue with your squealing and talking about me."

Blair scoffed, "Way to be modest Bass, who says we were talking about anything relating to you at all?"

He smirked, "Oh, I do apologize. I hadn't realized you two often discuss having dirty limo-sex, would you mind including me in this conversation?"

Blair shot Serena a glare and Chuck laughed, "Just a tip, if you don't want someone to overhear a private conversation try not repeating everything in an extremely audible scream."

Serena glowered, "Thanks for the advice, come on Blair."

Folding her list carefully Blair handed it over, "Just some suggestions." He nodded his thanks to her as she closed the door behind her and let out a deep breath.

Serena lifted an eyebrow, "So how did you end up in there exactly?"

Carefully ignoring her Blair flounced ahead tossing her head to the side as she threw out a distraction, "So how is Dan?"

* * *

It was close to midnight and they had repaired Serena's room back into its previous state of order. The cleaning had at least found an outfit that Lily would approve of for the dinner.

Serena sat on the bed with a yawn, "You know, I wasn't too fond of this Van der-Bass thing at first but it's not too bad."

Blair shot her a small smile, "You do have a tendency to over-react."

At this Serena propped her head up with her elbow, "Me? Please, you are the biggest drama queen ever. Dorota told me about you keeping the box of Godiva beside your pillow."

Blair flashed a grin as she stood, "Well, I'll call you tomorrow. It's getting late and you have to get your beauty sleep for Brooklyn."

Serena stumbled over to her bathroom and waved as Blair left. After making sure she heard the door close on the other side Blair turned to leave but her feet weren't leading her towards the exit.

Instead they led her to Chuck Bass' bedroom door.

With an inward sigh she pushed the door open and pressed it shut tightly behind her. The sound of running water was echoing from the bathroom and Blair tried to take that as a sign she had an out. She could turn around and walk out right now to go home.

Of course as she told herself staying was insane Blair took a seat on his bed and unbuckled her shoes. She crossed her legs and shook her foot expectantly as she waited for Chuck.

He emerged from the bathroom with a cloud of steam clad in a pair of boxers, a toothbrush sticking out of his mouth. Chuck was running his towel through his wet hair and tossed the sweater he had been wearing onto the bed to put away when he was done in the bathroom.

Blair caught the sweater and carefully folded it before getting up and standing a few inches away from the bathroom. "I always imagined you with an electric toothbrush Bass."

Chuck choked on the mouthful of toothpaste he had been about to spit out. After rinsing out the remaining amount he hadn't swallowed he looked towards her incredulously, "I thought you already left."

Blair gave him an innocent shrug, "Serena thinks so too."

Chuck turned off the light as he walked past her back towards his bed, "What are you doing in here then?"

She nudged her shoes out of the way as she sat on his bed and he watched her warily. Blair wasn't quite sure what to say because she didn't know why she was in his room. She had meant to go home but couldn't make herself leave.

Now that he was standing in front of her the desire to leave had diminished completely. She bit her lip hesitatingly and when she raised her eyes she found that Chuck was taking a seat across from her.

They both just stared at each other, not moving an inch waiting to see what the other was going to do. Finally Blair shifted infinitesimally and Chuck smirked before reaching forward to brush a lock of hair from her shoulder.

Her skin tingled from the contact with his fingers and Blair closed the space between them quickly. Their lips met hastily, but when Blair laced her hands into his still damp hair Chuck jerked away from her.

Panting he tried to distance himself from her, "Blair...I don't know how to..."

Blair rolled her eyes trying to slow the frantic pounding of her heart, "That wouldn't have worked even if we hadn't already been together, twice."

Chuck laughed quietly, "I'm perfectly able to do _that_, thank you. I meant I don't know how to...be with you."

The fact that she had him stuttering was enough to make Blair's breathing quicken as she looked him straight in the eye, "Just try, if you're willing to so am I Chuck."

With that settled Chuck smirked at her, "We all know that I've unofficially been dating you the moment that you and Nate got together."

Blair raised an eyebrow, "So that means you'll never mess up, right?"

Chuck gently began to untie the dress she was wearing, "I would tell you yes but apparently part of this relationship-deal is trying to be honest. So I can't say that, but I can promise to always make it up to you. In fact, right now I'll show you exactly how good of a boyfriend I'll be."

Blair let him tug the dress up over her head as she pulled him against her and this time when she pressed her lips to his there was no rush. Instead of flinching away from the way her skin burned she arched herself against him, reveling in the way he made her feel.

After proving to Blair that he would in fact be excellent at repenting his wrongs Chuck sighed as he pulled her to his side. She smiled into his shoulder, bringing the covers to her chin and letting herself drift asleep against him.

* * *

At the breakfast table all of the Van der-Bass' except one were present. Half-way through the meal Bart sighed, "Where is Charles? Did he not come back last night?"

Lily took a sip of coffee, "He stayed home honey, remember?"

Serena rolled her eyes, "I'll go look."

She pushed the door open and was rewarded with a partially exposed Chuck Bass entangled with an equally exposed girl. Serena hadn't had any encounters of this sort in the penthouse but she had figured it was only a matter of time.

As she was about to throw something at Chuck she realized she recognized who was lying in bed with him. Serena clapped her hands to her mouth to prevent her cry of surprise. The girl with the chocolate curls splayed across the bed was none other than her best friend who had clearly never left the night before.

She crossed her arms self-importantly, who had seen this coming? Oh, right that would be her.

Serena stood back and stared at the two of them, she had to admit they did look good together. At the table Lily glanced towards Serena's now vacant chair, "Where is she?"

Eric got up quickly, "I'll go find out." He went straight towards Chuck room because where else would he be?

Eric found his sister with her head cocked to the side staring at the sleeping forms of Chuck and Blair. "Whoa. I read Gossip Girl but I never had been able to picture them together, I guess I can now."

Serena nodded absently and the two fell silent for a stretch before Eric shifted his gaze away, "I feel creepy watching them sleep."

Serena stood still transfixed, "I felt that way too, for the first four minutes."

He snorted at her response as she took out her cell phone and dialed Blair's number. The phone began to ring and Blair dazedly lifted her head groaning and then gave up, resting her head back onto Chuck's chest.

Serena giggled and dialed again as Blair shot up this time scrambling to find her phone. She answered groggily, "Hey S. What's up?"

Serena watched as her friend resituated the covers and curled up on her side. "Oh, I was just wondering if I should have breakfast sent to you or would you be coming to the table."

Blair realized Serena's voice was not only coming out of her phone but also from the foot of the bed. She opened her eyes to see Serena grinning at her wildly. Tossing her phone back onto the ground she rubbed at her eyes, "It's so early."

Serena snorted, "Its eleven thirty and nice try. Now I'm totally right because you two are lying in bed together, naked so don't try to blame it on Chuck's face now."

Blair made sure she wasn't exposed before sitting up, "Actually I can blame it on Chuck's face. Except instead of an adverse reaction mine is the opposite. I mean really, just look at it, is it really fair for him to have a face like that?"

Taking a seat on the edge of the bed she looked between the two, "So, where does this leave you guys?"

Blair smiled and then realized Eric was there as well, "Hi Eric, I'm glad you and your sister have the opportunity to inappropriately stare at Chuck and I. Who are, by the way, officially dating."

Serena squealed loudly causing Chuck's eyes to flutter open as he struggled to get into a sitting position. He looked from Serena's glowing face, to Eric's nod of approval, to Blair who was watching him amusedly.

Yawning as he stretched his arms up Serena winced when the covers slipped lower and Blair grinned as she pushed them back up. "You could just leave and let us go back to sleep."

She rolled her eyes, "It's late already, my mom and Bart sent me to see where Chuck was, that's why I'm in here in the first place."

Chuck slung his arm around Blair's waist pulling her back to lie down, "Yeah, well we were otherwise occupied and didn't get much sleep."

Eric snorted at Serena's expression and Blair hit Chuck in the back of the head to apologize. "We'll get up, okay? A little privacy and we can get dressed."

As the two left Chuck threw the covers up as he wandered around in the nude trying to find where his boxers had ended up. Blair watched him with a small smile on her face, before getting up and trying to locate her own undergarments.

She found them easily and slipped them back on. Noticing Chuck's boxers she grabbed them to hide from him but he saw a flash of the fabric from behind her back.

"Stealing my clothing already? Maybe I am reconsidering this dating thing."

Blair rolled her eyes taking one last look at him standing in front of her naked before throwing his boxers over. She grabbed one of his button-down shirts and put it on as she turned to him challengingly, "Alright?"

He grinned and pulled her back onto his bed, "Lovely, and by the way I looked over your suggestions for Victrola." Chuck pulled the list over as Blair leaned against him when the door abruptly opened.

Bart Bass froze in shock and there were not many things in the world that could shock Bart Bass.

Blair quickly sat up but realizing she was dressed in nothing but a shirt of his son's, with her hair was a mess as she was lying in bed with him there was nothing she could really deny. "Uh...hello Mr. Bass. If you'll excuse me, I need to use the bathroom."

She squeezed Chuck's hand before she got up and hurriedly went into the bathroom. Blair immediately pressed her ear up to the door to listen.

Chuck handed the list to Bart, "Blair helped me come up with some ideas to tone down Victrola, you should have a look."

He took the sheet from his son and read through the list, "If you call and implement these alterations for my meeting, everything will be in order. Well done."

Chuck smiled at the brief compliment while his father directed his gaze towards the bathroom. "I want you to be careful Charles. Blair Waldorf is not someone to be thrown around."

Nodding Chuck nervously licked his lips, "I know, we're actually, we're uh...dating."

Bart's eyebrows shot up in disbelief, "You are currently engaged in a committed relationship to Miss Waldorf?"

Chuck shook his head in the affirmative, "Yes."

He looked once more to the bathroom before returning his gaze to Chuck, "I'm proud of you. Just don't let your own pride get in the way of loving her, Chuck."

Attempting to let the scene blow over Chuck met his father's gaze hastily, "Isn't that moving a little fast?"

Bart rested his hand on the door handle, "You can deny it but if you're currently dating this girl and you just let her spend the night, it's pretty obvious to everyone else that you're in love."

Blair was crouched down on the other side of the bathroom door stifling her laughter at what she imagined Chuck's expression to be. Once Bart had walked away Chuck shouted through the door, "He left, you can come out now."

Standing back up Blair yelled back, "Thanks but I do actually need to use the bathroom."

Chuck rolled his eyes; she had obviously been eavesdropping. His phone began to ring and after locating and successfully kicking it underneath the bed Chuck picked up.

"Nathaniel! What are you up to?"

Nate was obligatory shopping with his mother, not that he was informing Chuck of that. "Nothing really, and you? You're sounding groggy, were you busy last night because if it wasn't with Blair I don't give my approval."

Chuck grinned as he found Blair's dress and tossed it on the bed, "Well then I'm glad I acted within your authorization."

Nate smiled in response, "I assume you're both happy then?"

Chuck laughed, "Technically, she's roped me in man, we're dating."

Nate pumped his fist up in silent victory, "Oh, you're in deep. I knew it! I knew it all along."

Rolling his eyes as Blair came out of the bathroom she motioned questioningly to the door. He nodded, "Okay Nathaniel, I'll call you back later, have fun shopping with Anne."

Nate spluttered in indignation as Chuck laughed and hung up. Blair glanced down at her bare legs, "Should I put some pants on?"

Chuck shrugged and motioned to his own scantily clad form, "I'm going like this and by the way Nate heartily approves."

Blair smiled as she pulled him towards the door, "What a sweetheart, we have to set him up with someone nice. Now, let's go eat breakfast then, I'm starved."

The two slowly ventured their way to the kitchen and arrived just as Bart was leaving. He gave a curt nod and ordered his place to be cleared as Lily looked around in confusion; her back was facing the hall. "We're having another guest?"

Chuck took his seat and Lily raised her eyebrows, "How nice of you to join us Chuck."

Blair delicately slid into Bart's empty chair and Lily's eyebrows went even higher. "And Blair!"

She took in her attire and cast Serena an inquisitive look but her daughter was pointedly buttering a croissant. The initial shock wore off and they were all chatting comfortably within several minutes.

Blair's cell phone began to ring and after Serena held up her arms to prove it wasn't her she answered.

Eleanor checked her watch impatiently, "What time are you going to be home?"

Blair rolled her eyes, "Hello to you too mother. I'm at Serena's, we're just having breakfast."

Sighing dramatically she pulled out a different pair of shoes from the closet, "Well come home immediately afterwards, I want you to attend a luncheon with me."

Blair grudgingly agreed and after another gulp of orange juice stood up, "Excuse me, I've got to be home, sorry for dining and ditching."

She went to go change but decided on staying dressed the way she was until she got home and could shower. The cabbie wouldn't mind, if anything they would prefer what she was wearing currently.

Chuck and Serena got up as Blair headed for the door. They cast each other a look as Chuck pulled out his phone, "I'll call the limo for you."

Serena pulled Blair to the side, "I'm showing up later tonight and you're going to explain everything okay?"

Blair grinned at her golden-haired best friend before promising to tell her exactly what had happened. Chuck looked up as she was leaving, "Did you want me to walk you down?"

She shook her head, "No thanks, my mom wants me home right away and somehow I have a feeling we'd end up either stuck on an elevator or "getting lost" on the way back."

Chuck shrugged and gave her a parting peck on the cheek as Lily was watching his every move. Blair waved to her and Eric before heading towards the aforementioned elevator.

She slipped into the leather seats of Chuck's limo with a smirk he would have been proud of. Blair had had enough of settling. She was taking what she wanted and what she wanted was simple.

Complete revenge on Jenny Humphrey, as seeing she had just secured commitment out of Chuck Bass that will be _nothing_ in comparison.

* * *

A/N: Hope it lived up to expectations! I tried to keep it in character but it's difficult to do when I have all this romantic fluff oozing out of me. And no worries, the bicycles will be back for the last chapter, which I'm pretty sure is the next one. Review? Please? For Chuck's Face?


	5. If You Brake, You Don't Win

A/N: So first things first. I'm terribly sorry about not updating for such a long time. I ran out of plot, but enough excuses. Now onto the last installment of Training Wheels!

Disclaimer: Still not mine. The chapter is a quote from Mario Cipollini. Yes, I did choose a cheesy bicycle related quote, thank you.

* * *

**If You Brake, You Don't Win**

Blair tried to slip out of the elevator discreetly but Eleanor was commandeering the floor-mopping maid right in the foyer. "There you are!"

Her voice trailed off as she took in her daughter's disheveled appearance. "Where were you again?"

Blair rolled her eyes while trying to edge up the stairs. "Serena's, I was eating breakfast and you interrupted to tell me to come home, sound familiar?"

Eleanor pursed her lips and nodded but still eyed Blair's apparel skeptically. "You're wearing a men's dress shirt."

Blair pretended she missed the step in front of her as an effort to turn around. "Serena, who does happen to have a brother, lent it to me."

She decided to conveniently leave out that he was almost the step-brother.

Eleanor's eyebrows furrowed as she stared at the billowing shirt. "Well, I'll have to speak with Lily about getting some clothes that fit Eric properly."

Blair shrugged before calmly ascending the stairs.

As to be expected the luncheon was boring and her presence was unnecessary excluding that fact that a colleague of Roman's was there. Eleanor had essentially thrown her daughter at the woman to battle with small talk while she downed champagne in the corner.

She glowered at her mother as they climbed into a taxi. Eleanor only waved her hand apologetically. "You did marvelously, there's no need to be upset with me."

Blair didn't bother dignifying her remark with a response. For the last half hour the woman had talked about hand-bag straps. She enjoyed purses as much as the next person but when getting into the logistics not even Blair could find it in herself to care.

Across town Nate and Chuck were laughing relentlessly at each other. Lily had attempted to aid the two in "tidying" their hairstyles for a suitable rehearsal dinner fashion. In the end they each had a half a bottle of gel slicked through their hair and resembled the Fonz, on a good day.

Nate excused himself to go and stick his head under the sink after a stray cashew rebounded from the buoyancy of his hair. Chuck was still snorting alone in his bedroom when Nate's phone began to ring.

Chuck knocked on the bathroom door. "Hey, man, your phone is going off."

Nate was currently scrubbing at his head furiously. "I'm a little busy right now. Can you get it?"

By the time he located the phone it was already on voicemail. Chuck curiously glanced at the screen and saw that the message was from little Jenny Humphrey.

In the next second he had the phone up to his ear to listen to the sniffling message.

"Hey Nate, it's Jenny. I didn't want to tell you but Blair came to my house the other day and... I know you'll help me but I don't know what to do. Well I have to go but if you can say something to her, I'd appreciate it, thanks Nate."

Chuck regarded the phone incredulously as if it was responsible for Jenny's words. He was impressed that she was conniving enough to contact Nate. However, any admiration was outshined by the amount of stupidity needed to leave a message with that much incriminating evidence.

He rolled his eyes as he deleted the message and tossed the phone onto the bed as Nate re-emerged from the bathroom. His hair if anything looked worse because now the gel had set as he was morphing it into a haphazard state. Chuck raised his eyebrows and set his mouth not to snicker.

Nate pushed him as he walked by. "Go ahead, laugh. Who called by the way?'

Dismissively Chuck lifted his hand to touch one of the spiked locks on his friend's head. "Wrong number."

Eric walked into the room with a slightly terrified expression. "Hey, my mom asked to do my hair and I wanted to see what yours looked like before I-what the _hell_ happened to your hair?"

Nate pursed his lips as he patted his head. "Oh, this I did to myself, on accident. Before my hair looked like that."

He pointed towards Chuck who used his palm to smooth his already slicked back hair. "I'm thinking about wearing my hair like this all the time. Come on Eric, your hair would look even better because it's the longest and it has all that multi-faceted sheen."

Eric regarded Chuck's hair in disgust. "I actually think your hair has more sheen than mine right now."

Nate nodded in agreement before Chuck motioned towards his own head and Nate abruptly stopped mid-nod.

Lily poked her head around the corner of the room. "Ready Eric?"

Eric's eyes widened as he floundered for an excuse. "Uh, actually I'm reconsidering Mom. I think my hair is fine the way it is, why mess with it?"

She sighed exasperatedly as he held his hands up to his hair protectively. "Eric, don't be ridiculous. Look at Chuck and Nate...well I certainly didn't do that to Nate. But don't worry, yours will look _much_ better."

Lily clamped onto her son's arm and tugged him from the room as he tried feebly to resist.

Nate grinned as he got to his feet. "Well I have to say, the Van der-Bass penthouse never has a dull moment, does it?"

Chuck snorted as he complained. "It makes me long for the days when I could walk around my suite naked with only chocolate covered fruit and a scotch. Now Lily insists I clothe myself and expand my dietary samplings."

Shaking his head Nate patted him on the shoulder. "How you must suffer."

Chuck smirked in response. "Alright, you can go now. I see you edging towards the door. You have to go pretty your bangs up before going out into society with the lovely Anne."

After attempting to seem angry and failing miserably, Nate settled with a laugh instead. "Fine, make fun of me and my Mom but when Lily starts asking you to go to lunch with her don't expect anything but the same from me."

Chuck raised his hands up in joyous mockery. "Oh I've always wanted to have a mother inclusive double-date. Hopefully you'll schedule one some time soon?"

Nate shot him a final grin before leaving to go fix his hair. He did want to try and avoid having his mother attempt to enroll him in the drug rehabilitation center alongside his father.

Chuck was busy wincing at his reflection when he was interrupted by his phone flashing Blair's number across the screen.

He picked up eagerly, Blair would no doubt appreciate the new tendril of information he had over Jenny Humphrey.

Chuck figured some form of pleasantry was needed before he could tell her the news. "How was the luncheon?"

Blair situated herself away from her mother as she responded. "Terrible and your afternoon?"

He laughed as he finally tore his eyes away from his hair. "Well actually I believe I can help to brighten yours."

Blair sat up a little straighter. "Oh? And how is that?"

His smirk transferred through the phone. "Well Nate was over not too long ago and he was unable to receive a rather interesting voicemail."

She raised an eyebrow as she waited for him to continue. "If this concerns anything to do with Nate's weird obsession with those tiny pewter anchors I don't care."

Chuck laughed as he kicked his door shut. "Actually it concerns the staggering advancement of modern technology. I hadn't realized Jenny Humphrey's whine could be preserved through phone distortion."

Blair's grip tightened on her phone. "What message?"

Chuck paused for effect before drawling. "Little J was whining for Nathaniel to mount his white steed and slay the fire-breathing dragon for her."

She snorted at his metaphor. "Your flatteries are making me blush."

He laughed briefly before responding. "Well, now I expect you'll act accordingly."

Blair smirked as she absently glanced out the window. Little J had just handed her everything she needed to put her back into her place. "I plan to and can I assume your aid is always at the ready?"

Chuck began unbuttoning his shirt. "Well almost always. Currently you're on your own because I've already made other plans involving nudity."

He could tell she was ready to respond with less delicacy than a Waldorf was prone to when he intervened. "You can join me of course."

Blair narrowed her eyes. Chuck was either purposely trying to rile her up or he didn't understand the limitations a relationship put him under. Considering whom it was both options were just as likely. "What plans exactly?"

He smirked as he started the water. "I'm curious as to why you sound skeptical of my sincerity. The act of regularly showering is not a joking matter."

Blair rolled her eyes at his statement. "Apparently, didn't you already shower last night?"

Chuck grinned as he grabbed a towel. "Yes, and this morning too."

She wrinkled her nose. "What's the matter with you? Don't you even think of answering that with 'I'm a dirty boy'."

He guffawed in mild indignation. "Please, I was just going to tell you that the penthouse showers have comfort-height nozzles."

Blair laughed as she shook her head. "I'll keep you updated on my scheme."

Chuck feigned shock as he responded. "What you're not going to join me?"

She snorted as she mockingly cooed, "Bye-bye, now."

When the cab stopped Blair swiftly retired to her room to formulate the plot that would rip Little Jenny to shreds. She was tempted to draw a diagram, along with realistic figures scaled to size but she thought that would be going a little overboard.

She was so absorbed with her task that when Serena walked into the room Blair nearly sent her back out. Of course Serena was on a mission and would have none of that so Blair had to take a brief interlude in her plotting.

By the end of the story Serena had a grin on her face that was threatening to eventually dominate her facial features and Blair informed her so. She wasn't to be deterred though, and Serena squealed out. "I just can't believe it! It's so exciting! Are you telling anyone else?"

Shaking her head Blair sighed. "Not yet, I just got myself out of Gossip Girl's spotlight."

Serena grinned as she got up, "Well I just wanted to find out how 'I'm leaving' turned into sharing a bed with young Charles. So, I've got to be back for dinner, but wait! Did Chuck tell you what my mom did to him today?"

Blair's eyebrows lifted curiously as she pointed out the obvious. "That sounds horribly wrong."

With a burst of laughter Serena shuddered. "Ew, B! No, she tried to fix up his hair, Nate and Eric's too. They looked completely ridiculous. Chuck was in the shower for an hour and he still couldn't get all the gel out."

That certainly explained Chuck's supposed shower fetish. After one last manic grin Serena was off with a whirlwind of bouncing, blonde waves. Blair found herself to be in an extremely good mood. The day, excluding the luncheon had been very productive.

She found she was anxious to put her scheme into motion and decided to be pro-active with the extra energy.

Dorota nearly dropped the tray she was carrying when she saw Blair slowly peddling her bike through the foyer. Looking up Blair smiled briefly before focusing on her steering. The last time she looked away she nearly broke her mother's Venezuelan flower vase. Dorota hurriedly carried the tray to the table before wiping her hands and watching Blair as she made a loop around the room. "Miss Blair, look at you! You could race with all those skinny men in France!"

As she spoke Blair nearly rammed the bike into the banister making her cringe. "Well, perhaps a little more practice."

A little more practice turned into many hours of practice. Yet at the end of the night Blair was comfortably riding atop her bike and the entire foyer was empty. Dorota didn't want to risk any accidents and removed every single breakable item from the room then she proceeded to relocate the ones that couldn't be broken.

Blair smiled brightly as she removed her grip from the handlebars to wave as Dorota clapped. She came to a clean halt and slipped off the bike. "Well I think that's enough for one night. I'm going to bed; I have to be up early tomorrow."

* * *

Blair Waldorf sat pristinely poised on the stairs of the MET. After setting up a mildly deceptive ploy or two she was ready for Jenny Humphrey. The naïve blonde latched onto the bait and was furtively making her way to the stairs at that moment; essentially stumbling into her own grave.

Jenny abruptly came to a sudden stop as she spotted Blair's bowed head and cast her eyes around frantically. Last night she had received a text along the lines of: 'The MET at 7:30 -Nate ', and along those lines meant that was the exact text message.

As she tried to unsuccessfully search the area for Nate one last time Blair made the descent down the stairs. "Hey, Little J! Looking for someone?" she asked with exuberant curiosity.

Self-consciously straightening her hideous headband Jenny shrugged in feigned indifference. "No, actually I'm just heading to Constance early", she said in an attempt to flee the site and shed Blair's presence. Her attempt failed horrifically as Blair firmly fell into step beside her.

"Oh?," Blair inquired pleasantly, "Because maybe nobody told you but it's bad form to tell lies to someone who's already aware of your intentions."

Jenny glared at her unwelcome walking companion. "Well maybe nobody told _you_, but it's bad form to sleep with your boyfriend's best friend."

With a delicate eyebrow raise Blair smiled patronizingly at Jenny. "Well thank you for stepping in to inform me so."

She picked up her pace making Jenny hustle to keep up; getting an irrational sense of vindication from watching Jenny do an awkward run-walk to match her speed. They entered the school grounds and Blair's gaze flitted to where Chuck was standing with Nate and Serena.

Serena had her arms crossed with an irritated scowl on her face. Chuck had insisted on getting to school half an hour early and she wasn't quite sure how she had been dragged along. She looked up when she noticed Chuck give a subtle nod and saw Blair walking with Jenny. Serena sighed exasperatedly, of course Blair wouldn't let Jenny get away unscathed.

Giving Chuck a knowing look she elbowed Nate. "So, I see you both got your hair back to normal", she joked.

Jenny heard familiar laughter and looked over to see Nate. He was obviously at school early but why hadn't he shown up? To top off the situation Chuck gave his friend a brief nudge as he began to wave, "Hey, it's Blair."

Nate looked over and waved along with him and then noticed Jenny. He smiled at her as he gave her a separate wave; he hadn't spoken to her in a while.

Jenny looked down quickly in embarrassment. He hadn't shown up. Blair cast a pointed look at the blonde, "Something wrong?"

With a scathing stare Jenny tried to visibly turn away from Blair so she would leave. She didn't, instead staying right at her side as they walked through the empty halls.

Finally Jenny snapped as Blair offered to hold her back pack while she opened her locker. "Okay, what are you doing here?"

Blair cocked an eyebrow at her outburst but waited until she heard the brisk sound of heels clicking down the hall. With the aid of Chuck Bass' unique brand of sleuthing she had pinpointed the exact schedule of the new Principal of Constance. At seven forty seven every day she rounded this corner to get to her office.

Once she was sure Miss Queller was on her way Blair responded brightly. "So Jenny, where are we going next?"

The blonde anxiously began to notice that they were attracting a crowd. Somehow the halls had begun to fill and the ex-Queen was drawing attention to them both. Jenny had a reputation to uphold and she was determined to ruin whatever plan Blair was trying to work out.

She let the crowd get even larger before turning in a confrontational manner. "Listen okay? You're a slut. I didn't have anything to do with that so go away and do whatever it is you do now that you're not nobody. Oh, wait, since you seem to have a lot of fun with different men, Mr. Peizer's classroom is just over there. I'm sure he'd _love_ to write you a recommendation for your consistent performance."

Blair flashed a wicked smile in response before allowing her eyes to well up with unbidden tears. The group of students abruptly fell silent and began to hurriedly make space for the new addition to the crowd.

"Miss Humphrey", a voice intoned severely. Jenny turned around, a pit of dread forming in her stomach. Miss Queller stood, her face composed blankly while taking in Blair's teary eyes and Jenny's terrified expression. She walked ahead of her students before turning back briskly. "My office please, I would like to discuss with you some rather significant portions of our code of conduct here at Constance."

As she began to lead the way the crowd's eyes shifted back rapidly to watch as Blair stepped towards Jenny menacingly. There were no traces of her tears as she patted Jenny on the shoulder mockingly. "Too bad Little J. Don't you just wish Nate had been here to step in? Oh, by the way, nice headband. You don't have to worry; I'll be the first to let Gossip Girl know that used upholstery is 'in'."

Blair smirked as the audience parted for her. The Queen Bitch was back.

Serena stood by the doorway, meeting Blair as she emerged from the school. "I can't say I approve but I'm still impressed."

Blair flashed a broad grin as phones across the courtyard began to buzz furiously. Somehow she just knew she was going to have a good day.

_Hey UES,_

_Gossip Girl here and it looks like while B was out of power she got a few pointers from Bloody Mary. The Queen B has been reinstated while Little J has been cast aside. Who knows what will happen next? The bigger question is who'll be B's King? _

_You know you love me, XOXO_

_Gossip Girl_

Blair rolled her eyes as she slipped her phone back into her purse. "So, what's up S?"

All anybody could talk about the entire day was the remarkable and brutal dethroning of Jenny Humphrey. Not only had the blonde freshman lost her position in the Upper East Side's social rank but she was facing a possible suspension.

When the final bell sounded Blair found herself relieved to get away from the stifling atmosphere. She had enjoyed the attention at first but the admiring sycophants got tiresome extremely fast.

Looping her arm through Serena's Blair pulled her friend aside before they reached the courtyard. "Do you think you could help me out with a small favor?"

Casting her an amused glance Serena raised a skeptical eyebrow, "_How_ small?"

Blair widened her eyes as she responded innocently, "Practically insignificant."

* * *

Serena blew distractedly at her fringe before giving up and putting down the wrench to pull her hair up into a ponytail. "This is not a small, practically insignificant favor. This is a huge, extremely complicated favor."

From between the bike spokes Blair gave Serena an exasperated sigh. "It wouldn't be that complicated if either of us knew how to use these things." She waved around an open tool box as she spoke, quickly putting it back down as a hammer missed her toes by an inch.

Serena bent down, inspecting the bike seat contemplatively. She placed her palm flat on the seat, trying to wiggle it free. The seat didn't move. Blair watched with her eyebrows furrowed doubtfully. Serena backed up and stared at the seat again before gripping it in two hands and trying it wrench it from the frame. "Come on, you stupid cushion! Come _off_!"

Blair grabbed for Serena's elbow as she helpfully offered. "That doesn't seem to be working."

Serena let go and went back to staring at the bike seat before she turned to Blair with a shrug. "I don't know. Can we like, 411 this?"

The door to the Van der Bass suite opened and Blair and Serena both jolted forward to roll the bicycle into the closet while pushing the tool box under the bed.

Eric threw his backpack down onto the couch as he called out. "Hey, I'm home. Anyone here?"

Serena stuck an arm out of her room to wave before signaling to Blair that they were clear to continue in their sabotage. Eric picked up an apple and polished it on his shirt before deciding to figure out what Serena was doing. He pushed the door open and saw his sister armed with a power drill and Blair Waldorf wielding a gigantic pair of pliers.

Neither of them noticed his arrival and were about to lower their instruments onto the stubborn seat when Eric interjected the process with an honest question. "Isn't that Chuck's bike?"

He took a large bite out of the apple as the two girls whipped around guiltily.

Blair shook her head as she quickly answered, "No!"

At the same time Serena shouted, "Yes."

They frowned at each other before Blair lowered her pliers and stepped forward. "What we mean is yes, this is Chuck's bike but he can't find out we have it. I want to surprise him."

Eric took another bite from the apple as he rolled his eyes at her efforts. "Blair, I've know you too long for you to pull that kind of thing over me."

She grinned as she shooed him out of the room. "Very true but as long as you don't see us..."

He shook his head at her but obligingly shuffled out the door. "Yeah, yeah, go ahead."

Eric sat beside his backpack as he flipped on the television. It was after the daily installment of Jeopardy when he saw the triumphant procession of Chuck's bicycle being wheeled back to his bedroom.

* * *

Chuck stood to the side with a smug expression on his face as he surveyed the Waldorf foyer. Dorota had yet to replace the items she had removed from the room leaving it glaringly empty. "I'm not sure about this new decorating scheme", he remarked as Blair brought her bike down the stairs.

She rolled her eyes, "Ha ha Chuck."

After the back wheel clunked over the last stair she brushed her hands off and looked towards him expectantly. "Well? What are you waiting for?"

Chuck whistled as he shook his head, swinging his leg over the bike. "Does patience have any meaning to you Waldorf?"

Blair flashed him a winning smile as she mounted her own bike. "Of course it does. It's one of those conceptual things, like you know, the Holy Grail."

Right then as she peddled forward Blair was rewarded with all her efforts. Chuck sat down on his bike and the seat dislodged tipping him over and onto the polished marble. He threw the bike off of himself as he grabbed the seat and looked towards Blair accusingly.

Chuck narrowed his eyes at her suspiciously. "I can't believe you-"

She cut him off from the other side of the room finishing his sentence with, "-knocked you off your feet. I know, me neither."

He stared at her, still lying sprawled on the floor as she began to make neat little figure eights around him. "You are something else Waldorf."

Blair smiled at him as she continued her pattern. "Thank you."

Chuck stuck out his foot in front of her wheel as he responded. "That wasn't a compliment."

She shrieked as her bike swerved and she fell off on top of him. Blair attempted to straighten out her outfit as Chuck leaned towards her. She paused in her shifting and met his eyes as he brought his lips close to hers, letting her breathing quicken before resting his hand on her shoulder. Blair's eyes fluttered closed as he brushed his lips to hers before she let out a startled scream.

She whirled around to see Chuck's hand resting against the resonating bell from her handlebars. "Bass, you're an asshole."

* * *

A/N: Well, eight thousand years later this story has finally ended. Hopefully I haven't disappointed anyone. Please review! And to play on the sympathy card it's past midnight right now and I'm falling asleep on my keyboard. I figured I owed it to my audience, if it's still there, to update right after I finished.


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